down dooby doo down down, comma comma Neil Sedaka & Howard Greenfield
The rest of your message was asking "What works?" The only answer I can give is that you and your partner are the only ones who can work that out. I read a book years ago (can't remember what it was called) which from a series of interviews with gay couples. It interviewed them separately and together and asked all your questions. There were no answers, only differing points of view. The powerful thing about the book is you could read it and suddenly say Aha! when you read the one you feel is right for you. (To whoever has my copy, please return it.)
Panther - Thu Jul 13 9:23:26 2000
Moongod... Maybe we do make too much of the 'riding off into the sunset, hand in hand...' scenario. It is extraordinarily wonderful when it happens, believe me. When you know that you'll still be deeply in love with that same person for decades to come, when the level of trust is complete. But I agree, it's not what everyone wants, and even if most people do at some time, it's not necessarily what everyone wants at every stage in their life. There's much more to life than being in a relationship. In many cases, other things have to happen first anyway to bring us to the stage or state where we are well-rounded enough to carry a full-on relationship through and to get the best out of it.
Free Spirit - Sat Jul 15 19:37:22 2000
Moondog love is an action, yes, but much more importantly, it's a feeling, one that is all-pervading, one that once discovered, is a joy for life. And it needn't just be given only to one's loved one....I don't mean get your dick out with everyone else too, what I mean is, be loving to everyone that you can. Love is a way of life, being loving is a way of being.
Free Spirit - Thu Aug 10 22:00:09 2000
Mon Aug 14 15:40:29 2000. As you may or may not know, we're all here to learn things, to learn to be, to find ourselves and above all to learn to love (ourselves and everyone else). I'm sure that at the moment you only want to hear one thing - that he loves you. But can I say that you're putting yourself down by saying that things will only be good if/when he does? You're better than that. What you're going through is very painful, I know. I've been there, for longer than you might imagine. Later, I found that what I was learning was this: it was all right to love someone and to lose that love, that things would be all right afterwards. And they are - much much better than allright. Looking back, I realise that if we had got together, it would have been disastrous.
If the love is true, then he'll come back, if he doesn't, then it isn't meant to be. It's tough, but in your heart of hearts you must know this to be true. Take care - you *will* make it.
Free Spirit - Tue Aug 15 9:01:31 2000
The other aspect of low self-esteem if you are going out to meet someone is that you probably are not happy, and that shows. A happy smiling face is more likely to meet people and make friends than a miserable one. A miserable one may attract the mothering types and the users.
All this is, of course, generalisation. Everyone's story is different. Unique!
Panther - Wed Sep 13 8:55:37 2000
Find some trick to help you remember. Some that may work: make a point of saying their name a few times; write it down almost immediately; try and relate it to a song or place; be honest and say you have forgotten their name; call them mate or darling; avoid using names wherever possible.
Panther - Mon Oct 2 13:22:51 2000
The gutter is there if you want to dip your hand in it. The option always exists. It "could" "feel good" to do that for two or three seconds, but.
Free Spirit - Fri Oct 27 8:51:43 2000
Some clarification, as I think that there's some confusion about my contributions to this board. 1. I've only mentioned karma once on this particular board. 2. I didn't ever say that karma is everything.
I've suggested words to the effect of: give up being nasty to people in your life, and maybe then people will stop being nasty to you. Giving up being nasty - it's pretty easy, really. There are wonderful things happening in this world right now. Love really is all around us, every one of us. Everyone has the option to go beyond the superficial, to live in a harmonious way, to love, to let go of negativities.
Free Spirit - Thu Nov 2 15:09:17 2000
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