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Let's get back to the main topic of this wall: men who like men.

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Yep am the 53 yr old as mentioned in previous post.

Sex and age wise has never worried me so long as they were legal :) so didnt care if I got off with an 18 or 50 year old etc ( this was when say in my late 20's/30's)
but now I get more of the younger guys catching my eye and scoring a few etc and not sure what to think. As in its obvious they are into the mature/daddy look and then I think what the ! I am mature/daddy kind !!!!!!!!!
but then I think get over it. Nothing like a nice taught young bod to fondle.

No relationship yet but would like one. Like the other poster ie younger and very very very rich and oh well endowed would be a pleaser as well :)
- Sun 21 Dec 2008 11:06:38 Replies: 1

A good friend in his twenties formed a happy relationship with a successful and much older man. He was always mature for his age and it seemed to me he was attracted to the maturity and reliability of older guys rather than any monetary gain, which may be why their relationship is lasting. I doubt that he thinks of his friend as a Dad although there is enough age difference .
JT - Sun 21 Dec 2008 18:46:50

Age shouldn't matter
But for many people it does. If you're not a high up exec by 30, your career is a failure. If you're not CEO of several multi-nationals by 50, you've failed again (hey wait guys, there are only so many CEO-ships that can be handed out to buddies).

The MSM shoves youth at as day in and day out, and if you should have so much as one zit, Victoria Principal's right there to take a month's wages. And how many thousands of pseuo-execise machines have found their way to the op-shop because the purchaser started off with great intentions, then got bored, then wanted the space for a better lounge or bigger TV?

As far as age and shape go, there was this guy I really liked, and we clicked well on the net, but when we met in person, the magic just wasn't there. I mean he was so tall, I wouldn't have to kneel down :) .

I don't like my spare tyre, and while I know there are some people who like a bit of weight on me, I have not been attracted to them.

I guess age different alone doesn't worry me so much, just as long as there's no Zimmer frame involved.
The Professor Confirmed - Mon 22 Dec 2008 00:39:59 Replies: 1, 2

Thanks Professor for pointing out that now being over 30, my career is a failure. On the other hand, I usually enjoy my work and really don’t care about meeting anyone’s expectations.

We don’t have to accept our media’s obsession with sex, youth, marriage, fashion, drugs and any other craze that is going. The gay crowd is too ready to buy into all this hype.

Most men of all ages are still down to earth, relaxed, friendly and able to see that what lies beneath the skin is what matters.

Don’t worry and be happy.
- Tue 23 Dec 2008 09:22:25 Replies: 1

So agree.

I think most people at some stage in their lives ( usually younger ) go with the media hype. Then after a few years or so most wake up to it. I see so many young gay guys with all the latest haircuts/clothes/shoes etc
but then you see other guys from say 30's up and they are not as much into to . Sure the odd piece of clothing etc but not the full head to toe thing.

And Professor not a CEO so a failure ? puh-lease. I could have been way higher up the ladder in my profession but my "attitude" just would not let me take those jobs. There is no way I could be a Manager or CEO and work with people I dont like. If I dont like them I dont talk them. And the higher you go the more shit that gets shovelled your way. We all love to pass problems onto our Managers :)

I dont care if a guy is a CEO or works behind the counter at K-Mart . A job is a job and they are out doing their best. Besides its not guarantee a CEO is going to have those eyes, that cock, that personality. It happens anywhere, anytime.

You can get rid of that spare tyre if you try. I know you mentioned you have certain medications are the problems but have you really exercised ? gone on reasonable diets etc ? most can get rid of it. Sorry if you cant but just asking have you really put any effort into it ?
- Tue 23 Dec 2008 15:28:17 Replies: 1

I had a relationship with a guy 14years older than me for over 4yrs. Currently I'm in a relationship with a guy who's 3yrs younger than me. They had different body shapes and I've found happiness with both of them.
I think a successful relationship depends more on how well you are able to communicate with each other, as well as having a shared sense of humour. You do also need to have a physical attraction at some level (unless you're not going to have a physical relationship).
If you want to meet someone you need to put yourself out there "on the street" - let them see what you look like, read your body language, get an upfront feel for you.
The Net is such a dodgy meeting place for a relationship. I've wasted hours talking "candidly" to someone under the safety of anonymity when at the end of it, I still based most of my opinion about them on the first 30sec of meeting them in person (which almost always happens when you meet someone for the first time).
If you don't like the spare tyre then change your diet and get some exercise. You'll feel younger, healthier, have more energy and likely feel better about yourself - and that's attractive to a lot of people.
You'll only get success out of putting in the effort and taking the risk.
Jellygoop Confirmed - Wed 24 Dec 2008 18:50:09 Replies: 1

The Net -

no matter how good the pics look

no matter how big the cock

no matter what they say

the one thing the net cannot get across is CHEMISTRY.

Agree that in person you can sum someone up very quickly.

Definately over internet hook ups.
- Fri 26 Dec 2008 13:59:06

Of course age matters.
You have two different people at two different stages in life.
Usually its the younger one that suffers as the older one has experienced life already and stops the younger one from having his own experiences. You cannot live on another's memories which always seem to be thrusted onto the young one... Sadly the older one gets their way through mental manipulation and guilt trips.
If any young guys are considering a "relationship" with an old fella make sure hes rich and generous to you otherwise you will regret missing out on the enjoyable things people of the same age do together.
The sex is also an issue, impotence strikes more often as the guy gets older and he quite often blames the younger one for not providing enough stimulation.
Boys don't do it.....enjoy yourself and have a good life which fulfills you in all areas.
- Tue 30 Dec 2008 17:24:34 Replies: 1
This is the opinion of the poster.

I wasn't generalizing, I was citing the MSM mentality that is thrust on us all.

And I did point out that there aren't enough available CEO-ships to go around the number of competent candidates--but there always seems to be plenty when there's an incompetent candidate in the building.

As for my "spare tyre" I was walking up to 15km PER DAY and it made no difference--and I mean serious walking: I had to get my job done. When you have six settlements all over the CBD you have to walk, because it's quicker than catching a taxi.

There was one herbal product on the market that helped shed weight like draining a fuel tank, but it got taken off the shelves during the Pan Pharmaceutical debacle, and no equivalent has returned.

We have continued the balance of that effective treatment to keep things "stable".

We have explored the Nutrition aspects (no go).

I've been palmed off to a psych FOUR times, and given a clean bill of mental health.

The next one on the list is the endocrynologist.
The Professor Confirmed - Sorry for any typos, but it is new year and drinks will happen... - Thu 1 Jan 2009 01:43:27 Replies: 1

My 40 years old partner has had a moderate spare tyre for 20 years which dates back to the time he stopped smoking and gained too much weight. He eats good food and is very fit otherwise but nothing he did to reduce it made much difference. Now he is happy to live with it and I wouldn't change him.

I have read some men are more prone to this so perhaps you should accept it and just concentrate on general good health.
- Fri 2 Jan 2009 10:55:15

I'll say its the opinion of the poster.

What a heap of crap !

Maybe you got burned ? but dont generalise like that !

Actually your post is toooooooooo funny its so mis-informed.
- Sun 4 Jan 2009 21:34:39 Replies: 1

I agree with you. Some people think a relationship is mainly about sex.

A meaningful, lasting relationship has little to do with sex and is concerned more with mutual interests, respect, love and support for another person. An age difference need not be a factor and may actually add an extra dimension to the relationship.
TG - Tue 6 Jan 2009 09:10:51 Replies: 1


sex is still an important part. Of all my friends who have broken up over the last 20 years its been mainly over sex not over mutual interests.

Not wanting to generalise as there are those who are happy to overlook the shortcomings in the bedroom but if you aint getting it in the bedroom then eventually you go looking elsewhere.

So I reckon sex is equally as important ?
- Wed 7 Jan 2009 14:48:13 Replies: 1

OK, I should not have said "little" to do with sex. My mind must have been on something else for a moment.
YG - Wed 7 Jan 2009 15:30:31

A 50-year old man was sentenced in Melbourne today to 19 years jail for deliberately seeking to infect a number of casual male partners with HIV.
- Fri 16 Jan 2009 19:51:58 Replies: 1

From my observation the general public now associates behaviour like this with a ‘gay‘ lifestyle. I don’t know of anything we can to do to correct the image. Few of my friends admit to being gay. Perhaps rebranding is the solution.
- Sat 17 Jan 2009 16:28:55 Replies: 1, 2

From your observation? If people you observed think that this is regular gay behavior, then I don't think those people would be accepting of gays no matter what.

Education is always the solution.
- Sat 17 Jan 2009 17:31:50

Don't know about that.

Not so long ago a guy in Adelaide ? was jailed because
he was HIV+ but was having sex with a number of women.

Unfortunately in the Western world a lot still HIV is a
gay only disease.
Education is the only solution - Mon 19 Jan 2009 15:51:48

Save where I'm up to?
Has anybody else had this problem? Since Pinkboard had a few problems a couple of weeks ago this function just doesn't work anymore for me. I've only tried to use it on my home PC but I didn't have any problems with this until Pinkboard announced it was having those problems a couple of weeks ago. Is there a solution anybody can tell me?
- Tue 20 Jan 2009 01:35:34 Replies: 1

Yep, I haven't had it work all month with either IE or Firefox. Assumed it was a 2008/2009 transition problem, but the new Party wall that only has 2009 content still don't remember jack :(
- Wed 21 Jan 2009 18:09:20 Replies: 1

I've discovered a simple solution. I just clicked on the (?) just after the "Save where I'm up to" and I was able to reenable the necessary cookie by following the prompts.
- Fri 23 Jan 2009 00:39:44 Replies: 1

I've just discovered that that was only a temporary fix. By the way, why doesn't somebody from Pinkboard say something about why at least two people (and I expect some other lurkers) have just recently had this problem? Is anybody there doing anything about this problem? :)
- Sat 24 Jan 2009 01:43:17 Replies: 1
Why doesn't someone email me to discuss this problem. The solution above is what I would have suggested. - Panther

"Why doesn't someone email me to discuss this problem. The solution above is what I would have suggested. - Panther"

Yes, the suggested solution enables cookies while the brower is open. Previously you only had to click the little box and they were permanently enabled. Close your browser and return to Pinkboard and the cookies are turned off / can't be found again.

It would seem there's not much being contributed to Pinkboard these days, so having to scroll to the end isn't such a drama on infrequent visits.
- Sat 24 Jan 2009 15:35:44 Replies: 1
If you are still having problems then email me. - Panther

Beauty (??) advice
I get sweaty alot, and now with all this heat i'm sweating even more particularly in the groin area between my thighs. unfortunately i've developed some dark patches in the groin area, and lately they have become much dark and more noticeable. i am already putting on a cream to stop me getting heat rashes there, but what can i do to make the dark section fade abit so they are not so obvious. it would be kinda gross for someone else to go down on me with those patches there i think.
- Tue 27 Jan 2009 22:23:00 Replies: 1, 2, 3

You may have a fungal infection. Try Canestin or similar. It is also worth asking your doctor about it.
- Thu 29 Jan 2009 21:15:25

Despite no one emailing me I have spent the last day trying to find out why this wasn't working. Firefox saved the position cookie correctly, but in IE it was not kept after closing the browser. I eventually tracked this down to a change in the way Tomcat handles cookies (not the Graffiti Wall code at all). I have implemented a fix, so it should now be working.

There is also a new button if you go to the (?) next to the "Save where I'm up to" that allows you to set your position to the latest position on all walls.

Please email if you are still having problems. If you email me then I can try to understand your problem more easily. If you don't bother to email me then I have to try to guess what your problem is.
Panther Confirmed - Sun 1 Feb 2009 14:47:39 Replies: 1

Just go to the chemist and ask.

Not sure about the dark patches ? unless its from you scratching ?

I get it under the arms and I use Hydrozole. Its a cortisone cream with something in it for fungal infection and works after a day or two.

Dont treat yourself though ! you could be reacting to the creams ( I have many times ).

Get advice.
- Sun 1 Feb 2009 20:55:10 Replies: 1

Okay, that seems to have fixed the Cookies Not Found problem with the Graffiti walls after closing IE browser.
- Mon 2 Feb 2009 16:03:59

I use "Resolve". There are quite a few anti-fungal, tinea/jock-itch creams available, and a good pharmacist should be able to advise you without embarrassment--it's Summer, lots of people have jock-itch.

The most heavily advertised product "Lamasil" (sp?), I found to be the least effective. Others may have different results.

For the toes, I found the best treatment was salt and bleach! Tinea is one of those things that once you've got, it's supposedly with you for life. Soaking my feet in the hottest water I could stand with lots of salt and powdered bleach got rid of it, and I've never had a recurrence in years. Obviously it's a little difficult to use this remedy around the groin...
The Professor Confirmed - Mon 2 Feb 2009 21:17:28

Re: Beauty (??) advice
It does sound a lot like a fungal infection, but a GP diagnosis is probably a good idea.

I concur with The Professor that Lamisil wasn't particularly effective for me. Due to financial constraints, I found 70g Daktarin cream was the most cost effective, but needs to be applied twice daily and it takes many weeks for the coloration to disappear. My GP told me to nuke underwear in the microwave as that is an effective way to destroy the resiliant spores from re-infecting. It's a bitch though trying to keep up the program for long enough to keep the problem under control. I think that once you have it, it's likely to recur seasonally.
SP - Tue 10 Feb 2009 00:59:51

Re: Re: Age shouldn't matter (but to SOME people it does)
Losing weight can't always be reduced to just exercise and diet: there can be other factors behind it that need to be addressed (i.e. being overweight can be a symptom of some other issue).

The Gabriel Method has some interesting ideas on why people become overweight and how to tackle it: I think he might be on the right track, although I don't necessarily agree with all his methodology.

Current medical thinking seems to be that at least 30 minutes of continuous moderate exercise is required to be effective at burning off calories. I'm not sure they have considered the reasons for it in the first place and it can be a bone of contention for those of us with Chronic Fatigue and who are overweight (caught between a rock and a hard place).

As to age shouldn't matter: it is relevant (i.e. we can't ignore the issues involved), but it may not actually matter to the participants.
SP - Tue 10 Feb 2009 01:25:13

Re: Re: Friends
"And what do you do when you admit to being post 400, and yet still look like 25?"

Professor, are you a vampire or was that just a typo? ;-)

I think if you went to Primetimers, or one of the equivalent social groups for over 40 gay men and were legitimately over 40 but looked 25, you probably wouldn't be short of attention: we like to believe that age shouldn't matter, but youth(ful) appearance does seem to be desirable.

I wouldn't pick me as a partner from a crowded room either. :-(
SP - Tue 10 Feb 2009 01:38:48 Replies: 1

No, a Time Lord, although, right now, a vampire would probably look healthier than I do...
The Professor Confirmed - Wed 11 Feb 2009 20:15:36

Re: Professor, are you a vampire or was that just a typo?
/me Smacks forehead. /me

Of course, what was I thinking, the TARDIS should have given me a clue that you were a Timelord.

If you look anything like the vampire on "Being Human", you would have no issues with looking healthy: that's one hot looking vampire. Such a pity neither of the male leads are gay (in the program). Nevertheless, it's entertaining for those of us with a UK feed.

I would love to look 25, whilst being 48, but I never even looked 25 when I was 25: started going grey at 21 and believe me, people treat you differently with grey hair (as they do with any aspect that differs from the norm).
SP - Fri 13 Feb 2009 23:58:19 Replies: 1, 2

guys it dont matter how old you look...
people look for a tight a*** and a hard d***.If you dont have these people aint gonna stay with ya.
- Sat 14 Feb 2009 18:06:31
This is the opinion of the poster.

I have the same problem, it's really bad during hot and humid spells although over the past 10 days hasn't flared up at all due to cool and wet weather. Best cream is Betnovate cream which is prescription only. When the itch flares up, put the cream on and hey presto itch goes away for at least a week in my case anyway.
dan - Wed 18 Feb 2009 16:23:55

Can we have interesting boys' topic please? Suggestions - relationships with fathers and straight brothers; women who are keener on gay men than they should be; those poor straight guys who look so awfully uncomfortable at the Mardi Gras party. Should I feel sorry for them? If so, how should I express my sorrow? Or should I kick their sorry arses?
Morrie - Sun 22 Feb 2009 00:48:18

I'd like some advice please. When I was 15 (I'm 25 now) I was turned on by my father. He's a big hairy confident man who's always the life and soul of the party. I'm quiet and shy but have always got on well with him. I made approaches to him (NOT the other way round) which he didn't reject. I found out later he'd had some encounters with men earlier in his life. He called it quits after a few months although both of us enjoyed it. He knows that I'm gay and is cool with that. Our family is very tolerant and inclusive. Mum is fine. I've had boyfriends since and brought some of them home. There are no dramas. It's just that I really prefer guys like dad and I'm embarrassed to take them home as the similarity is just too obvious. Guys my own age just don't appeal to me in that way. Am I very ususual?
Luke - Mon 23 Feb 2009 23:16:41 Replies: 1, 2

Your relationship with your father is irrelevant.If you meet a guy you like its up to others to accept them out of their respect and love for you.
mat - Wed 25 Feb 2009 22:16:04

The reason I don't look my age is because of the life-long Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. On the treatment of the one helpful doctor (2000), I have grown two inches in height, started growing hair where it never used to be (No! I don't want to be a bear!), and the final realization that my body never went through adolescence properly.

And yes, because of stress factors, I had grey hair before turning 18. Another comparison is myself against my sister. At 17 I still had milk teeth. Before 17 my sister had her "wisdom" teeth out. I still have mine.

My solution to hide the gray is bleach (leave the dark roots like Jules Lund), and I guess dressing younger helps. If only I could find the right vitamin balance to shed the weight (sorry, tonnage). :sigh:

If you want to keep your skin strong, smooth and "alive" massage is very good. I use a horse brush under the shower. The more blood flow you encourage in your skin, the more toxins are removed.
The Professor Confirmed - Sat 28 Feb 2009 00:40:34 Replies: 1, 2

I applaud your courage in mentioning a subject that seems to be another one of those taboo areas and rarely discussed.

Because of the lack of discussion, it's difficult to know the prevalence of attraction to one's male family members, but I doubt whether it is unusual. I lusted after my Father when I was younger, although I never had the courage to take it further and even if I had, I'm sure it would have been rebuffed as his interests were never in that direction. The feelings subsided once I developed sexual interactions with other men, although I must admit that they tended to be older initially.

The amount of erotic content portraying Fathers and Sons, siblings or older and younger men must mean that it does exist in social awareness.

Fathers are generally the closest male role models most young people experience, so it is perhaps not unusual that they are the nearest thing to hand in exploring one's development and attachment.

I'm reminded of an adage that goes: "young women often marry men who resemble their Fathers". Therefore there is already precedent for a fundamental attraction (and I have no reason to think it may be different for gay men). Of course it's generally not acceptable to marry our Fathers, so perhaps we tend to choose the next best achievable thing.

You might benefit from discussing your concerns with a trained gay professional as they would have a better handle on natural development and inclinations.
SP - Sat 28 Feb 2009 20:49:36

Professor, it's interesting to hear your symptoms vaguely resemble mine: grey hair at early age, mild CFS from early age but getting much worse from age 45, weight gain, feeling that I never went through puberty properly, wisdom teeth only erupted from around age 46 (although I think I lost milk teeth at the usual age); however you seem to have these symptoms more severely).

Is the treatment you are referencing, testosterone supplementation? Tests indicate my testosterone levels are within normal bounds, so in my case that is probably not the solution.
SP - Sat 28 Feb 2009 21:02:26 Replies: 1

Please don't take testosterone unnecessarily. It increases the risk of prostate cancer. Professor, "milk teeth" are the baby teeth that drop out when children are 4 or 5.
- Sun 1 Mar 2009 16:15:20 Replies: 1

It is because of the risks of taking testosterone unnecessarily that I have accepted my GPs findings and not experimented with supplementation as a solution.

However, there was a documented case in a recent TV program of a young man whose body had not made enough testosterone: the program followed the effects of a GP supervised hormone replacement program that was fascinating.

So, there are cases where the body's natural hormone development goes astray and supplementation is necessary, but this is always through diagnosis and under clinical supervision.
SP - Mon 2 Mar 2009 13:11:00

Attraction Experiences Post-First Time
In the spirit of fostering discussion and following on from Luke's recent admission, I am interested in hearing about the attraction experiences of other men, after their first time M-M sexual experience.

Did you find you were attracted more to men that resembled your male first-time sexual experience partner, at least for a while, or did it not have any effect?

I'm theorising that a first experience tends to imprint itself and guide later attraction (at least until more general exposure starts to rewrite that template). Perhaps the intensity of attachment of that first experience has an effect too (eg a quick blow and go, in the dark, at a beat, may not have much effect).

In my case, my first M-M sexual experience was with a somewhat older man (13 years difference), who became the sole focus of my attention for a short time: I found subsequent attractions tended to favour the more mature male for a while (perhaps because it was familiar or seemed safer), until I had exposure to more peer-age guys.
SP - Mon 2 Mar 2009 13:30:02

I agree. My first experience was with a lovely 30+ tradie on a beach. I was 16. I certainly looked for some time afterwards for guys of a similar age and type.
- Mon 2 Mar 2009 22:53:20

My first experience was with the local Pedo. I would have
been around 12 and he must have been in this 40's.
Only wanking etc and I also fooled around with the local boys my age. Again only wanking.
When I was around 16 I got off with married guy up the street. He would have been in 30's. The pedo gave me my first ejaculation.

By the time I hit Sydney I went for any age group up to say 40's but never in the from of the pedo. He looked more like your granfather.

I am now 53. I still go for anyone from 18-45'ish. Older if they are in really good shape.

Probably my only criteria is for guys in shape. Not talking gym bunnies but in shape and hung :) so I dont care if they are 18 surfies, 30 tradies, 40 daddies or
aussie or leb or kiwis.

So from my first experiences I have never gone after that look. Not something I consciously did, just something I realised after read this board.
- Sat 14 Mar 2009 17:02:03

I'm addressing several posts at once:

Despite two psychs at that time having already stated taht every "upstairs" was OK, the doctor in question put me on Xanax. Multiple tests have shown that the presence of the Xanax boosts testosterone to the low end of "normal".

By "milk teeth", I mean "first teeth", which at 17 there were at least three of which I still had not "lost".

I'm well aware of the dangers of prostate problems. My father's was removed and he's had constant problems ever since.

Relationships with parents and siblings? Were you asking about sexual relationships or how a gay person is accepted by same?

I have just crossed paths with a woman from one of those religions I hid in (some 20 years ago), and after losing two, she finally had three children, all boys--the youngest gay.

Naturally she was as indoctinrated as I, but when confronted with the reality of her own son being gay, she said "Fuck it! That's how he is, and I love him anyway."

He actually mentioned more stereotypical behavior amongst his gay friends, "Oh, you have to visit the parents, poor thing," and he's like, "No. I love my family. I WANT to go and visit them."
The Professor Confirmed - Sat 14 Mar 2009 23:13:35

Straight boy comments
I know it's unusual for a straight boy to be visting a place like this but I was attracted to both sexes up until shortly after the age of puberty and now identify as totally straight.

I hang around the gay scene mainly for the music and ambience these days; I find it hard to make friends there but so many times, I *wish* I was gay - you guys seem to have more fun than the straight world does.

Sorry to intrude but I am always wondering how and what you think.
Understanding - Thu 26 Mar 2009 10:55:20 Replies: 1, 2, 3

You should come hang out with me and my friends. We're just on the scene for the music and ambience ourselves. Outside of "gay" clubs and parties, we're just like any other straight/bi guy.

Send Panther your email if you're interested in hanging. :)
- Thu 26 Mar 2009 12:17:10

there must be a few of us!
i am straight boy (34yo) and have been visiting pink board - mostly the party wall(s) admittedly for nearly 5 years - i would be on here every week with out fail- i really enjoy reading it- in fact i often update my mostly gay circle of friends as to what is going on and what's topical in the community- i really enjoy reading sso and sx every Thursday too....i feel very comfortable in this world
- Thu 26 Mar 2009 13:55:08

Half my friends are straight and just like you.

Its way more comfortable, way less violence , way less
competitiveness than the straight clubs. They like the music and as you say the ambience, friendliness.

They know how to handle themselves if a guy makes a pass
and usually ends up drinking/dancing with them through the night.

And you are not intruding.

To be honest I would hate to live in a 100% gay scene and enjoy my mix of friends.

I can help you become bi/gay if you ever want to try :)
Enjoy - Fri 27 Mar 2009 07:12:54

I've got it! After six years of following his demented posts, I've finally got it! The Professor is really Agnes Moorhead posing as Shelley Winter dressed as Will Robinson! Thank God I figured that out. Now at last I can get a decent night's sleep.
Eureka! zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz - Thu 2 Apr 2009 22:21:26 Replies: 1

I'll pay that one!

When you refer to Agnes Moorehead, do you mean pre- or post-Endora? She was a wonderful lady.

Personally I would have a better chance of fitting into Will Robinson's clothing Shelley Winters, but it would still be a bad fitting.
The Professor Confirmed - Has it really been six years? - Thu 9 Apr 2009 00:31:37

National Men’s Health Policy Community Consultation Forum for Gay Men
Tuesday April 21 from 7.00 pm
Aurora Gallery Level 1, 43 Bedford St Newtown

The Federal Government, through the Department of Health and Ageing is currently developing Australia's first National Men’s Health Policy and is encouraging gay community groups across Australia to hold community consultations to feed into the development of this policy.

Gay Dads NSW is hosting a National Men's Health Policy Community Consultation Forum in partnership with the Australasian Men’s Health Forum (AMHF), Australia’s peak national body concerned with the improvement of male health. This is your opportunity to provide the government with a list of health and wellbeing issues facing gay men, and in particular, gay dads.

The goals of the Forum are:

TO INFORM by providing a snapshot of the main issues that affect men's health in Australia and look at the reasons why we need a National Men's Health Policy

TO LISTEN by providing an open and safe space for gay men and gay dads to list their particular health and wellbeing issues and express their beliefs about how the Government can best address these issues

It is vitally important that your health and wellbeing needs are included in this Policy - this is your chance to have your say.

The Forum will be facilitated by Greg Millan & Gary Hodson, Executive Members of the Australasian Men’s Health Forum.

For more information on the development of the National Men's Health Policy go to
via email Confirmed - Tue 14 Apr 2009 20:26:54

To cut or not.
Since things are pretty quiet on this wall at the moment I thought I might introduce a new topic.

Last weekend while reading the online news at SMH I came across a link for a discussion on circumcision on Essential Baby which is a Fairfax site on parenting.

This forum had some of the most venomous posting I have seen for a while and they put our Mardi Gras v Toybox etc debates to shame. The thing I found most interesting was that the majority of the posters were women who unsurprisingly don't have a penis of their own but thought it OK lecture all and sundry - including their husbands on the evils of giving their sons the snip and the psychological and physical damage that will ensue.

I don't have any strong opinion whether boys should or shouldn't be cut; I think it’s a matter for individual parents to make.

If you've got a bit of time on your hands this is the link:

The forum is now closed but my post was on about page 26.

The question I have is do any of us who have a cock and more cock experience than the general populace really care? Are there a significant number of guys out there who are cut and wish they weren't or are there uncut guys that wish they had been? Do any of us really want to look like our Dads or were any of us teased in school locker rooms to the point we became dysfunctional adults because of the decisions our parents made?

I don't want to start a fiery pro vs con debate that was well covered in the Essential Baby forum but am interested in the thoughts or experiences others of us out there have had.
boynxdor Confirmed - Fri 1 May 2009 20:31:55

How did I miss the public notice that now states that group sex is either undesirable or unsavory? There goes all of my fun adventures at MEN parties and Bodyline!

Apparently nothing illegal happened or the police would have proceeded to lay charges (7years ago mind you), from what you read online and in the papers it now seems as though that while these players were investigated and it was deemed that there was no case to answer yet the media apparently thinks they should be prosecuted for "moral crimes".

Does this mean that we should employ Sharia Law for all those things for the things that the recognised law and the respectable community apparently can't deal with? And what does this mean for the gay community and consensual group sex ?
- Fri 15 May 2009 23:38:35 Replies: 1, 2, 3, 4

most people don't have the capacity to work out complex situations so they just simplify things. it's much easier to just say "group sex is wrong" and to actually think through the complexities that come with group sex. ie. intimidation, power imbalances, sexual arousal and liberated sexuality.

Matty Johns did nothing to warrant losing his job apart from working in a fickle industry that jumps at the slightest thought that they might lose money.
- Sat 16 May 2009 03:12:06

I heard Tracey Grimshaw on radio this morning bleating that the other players in the room were "just as guilty as Johns".

Guilty of what though?

What charges are they facing?

If there was any wrong doing surely even one of them would have been charged with something? But the fact is they weren't. There was no crime here, just a media beatup appealing to the lowest common denominator.

Now an ex co-worker has come forward to say the girl bragged about it but all the moral highground just dismiss this out of hand because it doesn't go with the version of events they want to hear. Who cares if it's true or not? It supports the guys story so it must be a lie. Not even a seconds hesitation to consider it could be the truth and there is nothing wrong here.

The only thing I can see him guilty of is cheating on his wife and that's something that should have been private between themselves.

To anyone defending this modern day lynch mob I ask you a simple question - if you were investigated by police for an alleged incident and no charges laid, how would you be feeling 7 years later when crucified by the media hungry for ratings and selling newspapers? I hope none of you ever get put on trial by the media as you will never win, your guilt or innocence is of no interest whatsoever.

Grimshaw also said that this sort of thing goes on in other sports " but we're only looking at League ". If they're so morally outraged why not go after all other sports where this happens? Why only go for League? the answer is no one would give a f*ck if the same revelations were made against a Polo team or a suburban cricket team.

It wouldn't sell papers or get the TV/radio ratings.

It's all about celebrity.

The media can ruin some high profile lives and that's the publics favourite bloodsport at the moment.

Some of the more hysterical postings in this thread make me think of Helen Lovejoy overwroughtly crying "Won't somebody PLEASE think of the children?".

This faux outrage just as meaningless and laughable.
- Sat 16 May 2009 06:53:01 Replies: 1

Media- is really just one person... one righteous, homophobic, sex-phobic yet sex-sells supporter.... Rupert Murdoch. Although the original show appeared on ABC, R.M. has contributed to an overall shift in how scandals are seen, & ABC has followed.
- Sat 16 May 2009 09:06:18

"And what does this mean for the gay community and consensual group sex ?"

Nothing. Why should it? Gay men have been having group sex since time immemorial. We were hard at it back when it was a crime for a guy to have sex with one guy let alone 15. It will take more than an overblown footy scandal to slow us down.
- Sat 16 May 2009 17:44:33 Replies: 1, 2

Not much hope now for a media career for me given my penchant for hiring multiple hookers per visit :P
- Sun 17 May 2009 09:46:47

The girls aren't called groupies for nothing. They follow sport stars, rock stars et all. And why? So they can bed them singularly or in a group situation and go out and brag about it. Some of the girls are under the dillusion these stars might actually fall in love with them. If you are gunna regret yur actions somewhere down the track then don't put yourself in these situations. She was of legal age at 19 and had consented to sex with two players - because six more came in and watched whats the big deal. She wasn't forceably held down and raped she didn't say no at any stage.

It's all a media beat up and John's is being used as a scape goat. I'm guessing Tracy Grimshaw was wishing it was her in the room at the time.....
- Sun 17 May 2009 12:03:01

personally I HATE group sex!

I'm selfish and just don't like sharing!
- Mon 18 May 2009 09:28:41

Do you reckon we can get Matty and his mates to come along to the next MEN party. I'm sure they will fit in with the rest of us boys up to no good with our dicks out.

They might even get a chance to be treated as a piece of meat. I just hope they consent :-)
- Tue 19 May 2009 22:43:02 Replies: 1

70's sex
I'm 71 years young and can't get any sex. the only ones available seem to be 50s and younger.
Are there any older persons who have an outward view of life and keep themselves that way?
in other words , are there any older people, say 7o, who enjoy male company and sex in a mature form?
age should not be a barrier that dictates 'turning off' and slinking away to die.
- Sun 24 May 2009 13:13:29 Replies: 1, 2, 3, 4

so where does one go to have sex with a footballer? surely there must be some footballers who are into man on man action!
- Tue 2 Jun 2009 12:40:03 Replies: 1

The Racecourse Hotel in Christchurch apparently......
- Tue 2 Jun 2009 20:40:57

I posted much earlier about the age expectations pushed on people by the media, and I agree that a septogenarian would have a tough time finding a mate (even in the hetero world).

When my father wanted to remarry, my sister said "no". I never even got asked at the time and knew nothing of it.

When he got his inheritance from his parents, he said he wanted to visit Paris to view the "Crampton"--a steam engine of which he was very fond. My answer was: "It's your money, go while you're still alive." He never did and now he's not.

At 71, you could still have 20 years in front of you. I have usually kept a smattering of multiple-aged friends around me, although the older ones have been pruned away by Father Time.

People have wished me great sex in the past, and many probably believe I've had more than reality will admit, but I've learned to treasure the friendships. With CFS, sexual activity isn't high on the agenda (just thinking about it drains your energy), but the value of my friends (straight or gay) far outweighs the losses I have in the libido area. Of those men I've known to be gay, only a very few have been gut-wrenchingly attractive (to me anyway).

On a lighter note: Wank for Health! My nephew dug up an article that showed the more men ejaculate, the less likely they are to have prostate cancer. Frequent ejaculation flushes out toxins that accumulate in sexually inactive men. Sticky fingers, here I come.
The Professor Confirmed - Sun 7 Jun 2009 01:56:02

I'm sure there are many guys out there like you. Problem is finding them.

They won't have gaydar profiles or advertise on pinkboard because that's not how they were raised.
- Sun 7 Jun 2009 14:40:27 Replies: 1


but some of us have sampled the net and to be honest its just not worth your time. So many winks/emails and they go on for days/weeks etc.

but the one thing you dont get is that connection/chemistry with some. You get it instantly at
a bar/beat/SOP/on the street. On the net you only see
how good they look and how big their cock is.

So this 70/80's sex person has ditched the net well and truly.
- Tue 9 Jun 2009 11:19:07 Replies: 1

Relating to men as men
If you don't expect instant gratification, the net can be one of the best ways of making friends. The site below seems to have a following around here.

Relating to men, not as a sexual objects but as men, has been so rewarding to me in the last couple of years that I want to share the concept with anyone who is interested.
Craig - Fri 12 Jun 2009 07:58:24 Replies: 1

- There are only two sexes and biologically, only two genders as well.

- Homosexuality is universal among human beings and we don't need to explain it because it's normal behaviour.

These two ideas are from the man2man alliance site but they are also the essence of what I have come to believe. Is there anything controversial in this?
Craig - Wed 17 Jun 2009 11:13:13 Replies: 1

I'm not sure I liked that site Craig.

Can say exactly why, just a feeling I had when reading it.
- Wed 17 Jun 2009 12:54:17 Replies: 1

I think I may know what your mean. I myself rarely give 100% approval to anything I read.

I chose the above two statements from the site because they fit into my own philosophy. I don't like to look for largely imaginary differences between people but concentrate on the basic things we all have in common. I was interested to see if others thought I was off track.
Craig - Wed 17 Jun 2009 14:28:58

There are only two biological genders or sexes????

I think you don't know too much about biology mate!
- Sat 27 Jun 2009 18:22:22 Replies: 1, 2

Robert R. Heinlein postulated six genders:
1. Male (straight)
2. Male (bi)
3. Male (gay)

4. Female (straight)
5. Female (bi)
6. Female (gay)

He also allowed for personality, experience, nature versus nurture to allow these to become a much wider scale of behavior than the little pigeon holes we're so fond of use. Personally, I think he missed two:

7. Male (auto)
8. Female (auto)
The Professor Confirmed - Sun 5 Jul 2009 00:47:35

22 yo American Bi guy going to Cairns - what should I do?
Hey, as my title says. I'm a 22yo Bi American guy going to Cairns for a week. I'm traveling solo and renting a car while I'm there. I've been thinking of going on some tours, such as a boat trip with an introductory scuba dive and a rainforest something or other. I also wanted to drive around and go see some of the waterfalls.

Additionally, I want to make my rounds in Cairns gay nightlife scene to see what I can see.

Any suggestions?
American David - Mon 6 Jul 2009 07:10:13 Replies: 1

Is it worth looking?
I've searched for someone for about 25 years now. I've had two one night stands with two different guys. I've had some periodic fooling around with a guy who always claimed he was my friend and yet never touched me, in or out of bed, and who would get himself off and leave. Never caring if I was satisfied or not. Well obviously he wasn't a keeper and I eventually had the sense to get him out of my life.

I've had other guys that were interested in me but I didn't get any clue they were gay or interested until after they moved on. They'd be gone for weeks and then I'd hear 'oh so and so was gay and I think he liked you'. Great, why can't anyone tell me sooner. Always wondered why some of them were too shy to even say hello to me when I said hello to them.

I've tried the clubs but I never was thrilled with the deafening music and people that wanted to go home and have sex before you even know their name. Hey if I guy really does something for me I probably would, but for a long term relationship I'd like to get to know someone first.

Ideally get to know each other become friends and see how it develops or doesn't. At least you have a good friend.

Add to this that I am not the most comfortable in social situations, I manage (I've lectured to over 400 people at a time) but one on one and I'm a little difficult socially - apparently I have slight aspergers tendencies.

I've tried the Internet dating thing and I've found the same sort of problems in the clubs. Everyone seems to want sex or if you don't want exactly and I mean exactly what they're looking for they move on. I've had so many contacts that either died quickly or didn't go anywhere that I've given up on that too. I've deleted all my profiles, I'm just completely sick of it all.

Of course now I'm very very close to mid 40s and I live in Adelaide. So I'm beginning to wonder, should I move somewhere like Melbourne or Sydney where being gay is a little more open? Where activities where I can meet people are little more common. Where I don't keep running into the same people on the scene or the internet.

So do I move, give up or keep looking here? I don't want to haunt the gay scene until I die looking for mr right. If I'm not going to find someone I'd rather get used to the idea and stop looking and stop prolonging the torture and what ifs.
- Fri 10 Jul 2009 03:00:06 Replies: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

I can identify with your situation well, except that it's only since about 2000 that I "came out" to myself--let alone anyone else.

Tried the gay matching sites, and got disillusioned.

I've mentioned CFS before, so a highly active sex-life for me just isn't likely.

I've learned to value the friends that I have.

After my parents' divorce, my father started developing a relationship with another woman, and asked my sister's permission (WTF?) to remarry. She didn't like the idea, so he called it all off. (I only learned long after the event.) He never pursued a relationship again.

On Tuesday 2009-04-21, my nephew found him sitting in his favorite chair in front of the TV and the cat on his lap having gone to sleep for the last time. Had there not been a competing funeral at the same time, the service would have been Standing Room Only. (There were only about 3 empty seats.)

My point is, that even without a relationship, his life was not wasted. He built a $20,000 rosewood table, 5 different miniature steam locomotives (all incomplete), the rest of the house I shared with him for the last 8.5 years (also incomplete).

He used to visit a friend on a weekly evening and they would argue over the football on TV. He was a member of a wood-work club, a miniature rail club, president of the local youth club and myriad other things that escape my mind right now.

As I am now unlikely to ever leave town (it's my house), I have come to terms with the fact that there remains the chance that I will be single to the end, and that does not distress me.

I have my friends on whom I can drop in for half an hour and find myself saying "I really should be going home" three hours later. I'm connected to the local theatre group. My best friend (in town that is) is now a tenant along with his fiancée. All the friends I've kept from when I left Sydney mean I have a huge phone bill.

So, my suggestion to you is: Go and join a different social scene. You may still fail to find Mr Right but you won't be pining over what you don't have because you'll be too busy enjoying what you do have.
The Professor Confirmed - Fri 10 Jul 2009 20:33:00

Well I am in Sydney and my love life has been very similar to yours although I tended to say give them my number but switch a digit around :) as never wanted the full on relationship.
Thats been on going for 25 years now and rarely am I asked for my number :(
At times I would love a relationship but after living on my own for about 27 years I really enjoy my own company and never get down on not having a relationship but now and again think one would be nice.

Moving to Sydney or Melbourne may offer you up meeting up with more guys in different ways but it wont be a guarantee of a relationship.

Maybe go to pubs where the music is not as loud as say a club and if they want to go home with you then do it. You say you want to get to know them but can I ask you when out do you see someone that just clicks with you ? and others where you feel nothing ? well those clicks are your bodies chemistry and brain telling you that they are a turn on/interest to you so go home and have the fuck and see if they are any good in bed as that is just as important as a persons personality. If they are a dud in bed or you are a dud in the bed then people do tend to wander and look elsewhere. If you are compatible in bed well you can have the after conversation to get to know them better.

- Sun 12 Jul 2009 17:01:03 Replies: 1

Do you know something we don't mate?
- Mon 13 Jul 2009 07:35:39

Cairns has several gay resorts or bed and breakfasts you may want to check out. Using, try entering: Cairns Gay Hotels, to get useful travellers’ reviews of these places. Some reviewers also suggest which local bars to visit.

This is a beautiful area and the reef, beaches and rain forest will keep you busy for a week. The city has around 100,000 people so don’t expect a lot of gay nightlife. Good luck.
- Tue 14 Jul 2009 04:12:48

It is time to try a change of strategy, Adelaide is a fine city to live. Don’t move. Forget the gay scene.

Be friendly and helpful towards people from 18 to 80. Although they’re not what you‘re looking for in a partner they have acquaintances, brothers or fathers who could be right for you or they may even become friends.

When you meet people, remember that friendship and trust grow over years and when you get to know someone well, it is surprising how attractive they can become, regardless of age or appearance.

It is easy for us to fall into a trap of trying to mimic a heterosexual marriage with fixed roles in a relationship and the expectation of sex. This is probably not what you really want. Think about it.
TG - Tue 14 Jul 2009 15:14:26

Anal bleaching
Can somebody explain to me what it is - and any beauty salons on sydney that cater predominantly to men?
- Wed 15 Jul 2009 06:49:55 Replies: 1

Find a social group around a hobby that you are genuinely interested in. There are plenty. bushwalking, martial arts, book clubs, cycling, bridge clubs, marching bands, choir or even do some volunteer work.


Once you get to the social/volunteer group DON"T focus on a relationship!

Focus on pursuing your interest and friendships will naturally come from that.


you'll be exposed to more gay men (in surrounds where you can actually talk to people).

It's no gurantee, but the odds are certainly much higher the more gay men you expose yourself to (no, not that kind of "expose!).
- Wed 15 Jul 2009 06:55:23

Does anybody know a beauty salon that specialises in men? particularly those not normally going to beauty salons aka need alot of work! ;)
- Wed 15 Jul 2009 20:15:55 Replies: 1

From Wikipedia: Anal bleaching, or lightening, is the practice of bleaching the pigmentation of the skin of medium- to light-skinned people around the anus. Some people have some degree of darker pigmentation of the skin immediately around the anus, which can be mistaken for poor personal hygiene. Discoloration of the anal and vaginal areas can be caused by aging, hormonal changes from pregnancy, diet, and other factors.[citation needed]

Bleaching is used mostly for cosmetic purposes to lighten the color of the skin around the anus, making it more uniform with the surrounding area.
- Sun 19 Jul 2009 13:01:48

In Western Australia, there is a gay group called Primetimers who provide a social outlet for men aged 40+. There might be something similar in your state.

Whilst not setup as a sexual meeting place, I'm sure that friendships develop and could evolve into a sexual dimension. They might also know of other activities or groups that attract the more mature man and increase your chances of meeting someone suitable.

If you specifically want sex with peer-age men, you would need to go to a venue that attracts the target candidate.

If you just want sex, then you might have to widen your age range to the 50s and younger set.

I wouldn't rule out finding someone on Gaydar, but as someone else has pointed out, men of your era might not be comfortable in using that advertising medium.
SP - Sun 19 Jul 2009 14:04:11

As someone else has mentioned, perhaps a change in strategy to developing a friendship based on similar interests, which could evolve into a sexual dimension, might be a better approach.

Unfortunately the internet contact sites seem to be primarily used for hook-ups: there don't seem to be any online avenues for finding like-minded men.

I feel your pain and frustration, as I have experienced a similar problem in finding guys I can relate to (I'm now 49), however I have the opposite issue: my Social Phobia manifests in group situations and I'm much better one-to-one. Since most friendship/hobby/interest avenues are group based, they don't work for me, but they might work for you. I'm also somewhat ambivalent in the sex department as my health issues have shot my libido to hell, so it is not a primary focus for me (how I wish it were different).

I guess it also depends on what you are looking for.

Society seems to be so obsessed with the full-on relationship (and wanting it right now), or simply casual sex, that anything less is not even considered. Even Pinkboard Personals has only Relationship or Friendship (no sex) categories, but nothing inbetween. Maybe our expectations need to be reined in a little, but I don't think they should ever be abandoned.

I would like to see encouragement of a gentler "getting to know someone" process and the facilitation of finding like-minded others online and providing multi-threaded forums to openly discuss issues.

I think if you moved to a larger city, you might still find the same problem. Give the friendship approach (even a remote or pen-pal arrangement) a go first and try not to give up.
SP - Sun 19 Jul 2009 14:51:18

Well you don't say where you're from, so that makes it a little difficult to answer.

Adelaide: Destination Men (two locations) owned, I believe, by Troy Gray the exAFL footballer and now sports newsreader and sometimes TV presenter.

Boy could I go him :-) DROOOOL....

Others? Well I'm sure there must be but I can't remember hearing of any.

Anyone else?
- Sun 19 Jul 2009 17:45:17

Firstly relax and stop trying so hard.
I will generalise here it is not a personal attack.
The problem today is we are selfish in our attitudes.We all believe there is an "ultimate"person for us their fore overlooking what is right in front of our faces.None of us are perfect yet why do expect this of a future mate? We quite often here gays drone on about tolerance and equality yet we are quick to dismiss someone who does not fit our required image.Relationships involve alot of give and take but to have a good mutual relationship does require heaps of effort.Relationships are not easy,If you want easy get a goldfish.
I know queens that continually comment on how they cannot find a bloke yet when someone pops their head up ,they find fault and deny themselves the opportunity of happiness.People should get over their ideals of a Brad Pitt clone cause its extremely unlikely to happen.
wake up and smell the roses - Wed 22 Jul 2009 04:34:40

to 'Is it worth looking?' - have you ever considered that you do not really want a relationship at all? I often say this to people who complain about how they can't 'find' anyone. If you live in any city you are surrounded by opportunity, not for some ideal fantasy, but for a real relationship of some kind. I believe that anyone who is single wants to be and actively chooses to be single, no matter what else is offered to them, or what they claim to want. Conversely or contradictarily, I don't want a relationship and constantly meet people through sex hookup sites who claim to be looking for random sex, but are really looking for hearts and flowers. Go figure. In short, stop looking for an ideal that doesn't exist, and recognise the fact that you are just fine on your own!
- Wed 22 Jul 2009 10:26:22

You've covered a valuable point that I missed in my long convoluted saga.

There is a great difference in being "alone" and being "lonely". Even though my Father's passing frees me up a little socially so that I can come that little bit further "out", I can sit in this house secure in the knowledge that he is gone, and that it's not some sick April Fool's Joke, and feel genuinely lonely.

Haunting the Gay Scene desperately trying to find a partner sounds like the OP is "lonely in a crowd", and like I and other have suggested, get out and join other social groups or clubs. Being obsessed with finding Mr Right isn't helping in the slightest. Sit down, write up the defining characteristics of what you want, meditate on it for an hour or so and then burn it and put it out of your mind. The Universe will look after you.

Again I advise: focus on what you have not on what you haven't. You'll be much happier for it, and having visited Adelaide, the OP would be giving up a great deal of local/social goodwill by moving to either Sydney or Melbourne.
The Professor Confirmed - Fri 24 Jul 2009 23:13:51

Mr Cellophane
"cause you can look right through me
walk right by me
and never know im there"
- Tue 28 Jul 2009 02:38:46

Hell yeah, give Melbourne a go - forget Sydney. Melbournians are a lot more friendly people. Adelaide sounds to be too limiting, population wise. Join some gay social groups when there, begin making new friends and go from there. Mr 80% Right will turn up when least expect it.

As my mother always said, 'Lower your expectations, to raise your appreciation.'
- Mon 3 Aug 2009 15:05:59

6 degrees of separation
I'm in my mid thirties got reasonably nice job/partner/etc etc not depressed but feel a huge disappointment with myself and no emotion to whats around me.In a way my life seems surreal.I'm not suicidal yet have the urge to no longer exist.Have tried a shrink but they waffle on about the usual causes IE abuse /neglect etc yet they do not really apply to me.
Does this type of feeling occur with others and what solutions did you find helped?
clinically sane - Tue 4 Aug 2009 04:01:11 Replies: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Yes I have felt the same but can't offer any solutions. No one can tell what you need or 'should' do. Only you can work that out. "Feel a huge disappointment with yourself". Ask yourself why you use the word 'disappointment'. In my experience shrinks have little insight and only have processes to get people 'back to work' - i.e. fit this system. "urge to no longer exist"? Maybe you need to challenge yourself somehow - take some risks do something different to spark yourself up a bit. Trying being opposite. If you are very active - then sit and be still. If you are naturally contemplative, skydive! "reasonably nice job" It pays well but you don't really want it? Well that's most of us. LOL. I don't know if anyone can give you a real answer. Good luck.
- Tue 4 Aug 2009 12:11:41

Not all "shrinks" work for all people. If the one you saw didn't work, ask your doctor for a referral to another. You can also try counsellors. Also have a look at the Beyond Blue website.
- Tue 4 Aug 2009 22:19:04

If you do go to a doctor, they're likely to prescribe some form of anti-depressant as a matter of course. Just be sure to explore all the side effects of these medications and alert your partner and/or friends to these side effects.

A few years ago I was feeling very similar to what you've described and my family doctor put me on anti-depressants without ever explaining possible side effects. One of the drugs he gave me is known to cause suicidal tendancies in approx 28% of people who take it, but I was not warned!

In just a few short weeks, I went from just not feeling happy with a few things, to a stint in hospital after trying to take my own life. If I had known about these posible outcomes, my partner and friends could have kept a more informed eye on me and this might never have happened.

I've never really been the same since and have lost a lot of friends as I'm just not the same person I was before being prescribed these medications by my doctor.

Just be careful and good luck.
- Wed 5 Aug 2009 06:07:40

As he who has an opinion on nearly everything: I don't think you're "clinically" depressed, but somewhere along the line you've lost sight of a goal in your life. As your partner is part of your life, discuss the issue with him (particularly as a sounding board), and look for things that you wanted to do and never got started or failed to finish. It may be as simple as spending $7.95 at a hobby store and building the smallest model plane on the shelf.

You describe all the "haves" in your life, and I've recommended before that concentrating on the "haves" is better than the "haven'ts", but in this case, I don't think it's that "haves" which comprise your problem. I think it's "do's".

I know someone suggested throwing yourself out of an airplane (if at first you don't succeed, then sky-diving is not for you), but you may not have to go to such an extreme.

Your partner is part of your life, and I firmly believe that any solution should involve him.

My personal life as been "on hold" for a very long time, and even more so right now while I deal with my Father's Estate--and while the Estate's in Probate, there's no money and mounting bills. Like yourself I don't want to take drastic action to "end it", but I empathise with the feeling that it would be nice if it just "stopped" for a while.

I strongly recommend getting a referral to a counsellor, and it may be an exploratory path to try a mild prescription mood-lifter (SSRIs are NOT recommended!!!)

Is the "reasonably nice job" one that you actually enjoy, or should you be looking for something more personally fulfilling? A cut n pay for something that you enjoy far more could be the solution you seek.

In the 80s I had a high-paying IT position, and it was horrible, I just couldn't make ends meet and I was miserable. In the 90s, I had a much lower paying job, but was much happier, generally more flush with cash and was doing "really well", until the bubble burst.
The Professor Confirmed - Fri 7 Aug 2009 03:32:58

"As he who has an opinion on nearly everything"
When I read that I thought you were talking about me! LOL ;)
- Fri 7 Aug 2009 22:30:25

Porter st is across the road from the Market (and my house actually) but is a hit or miss affair there. You really have to be sauced up to the gills sometimes,
not much sweet meat there.

Try club 80 thats always a hoot with the hooligan rappers
jnr - Fri 7 Aug 2009 23:33:14

Sorry to see that Steamworks in Melbourne is no more! Many happy times were had there. RIP.
- Sun 9 Aug 2009 11:04:40 Replies: 1, 2

I recall feeling something like that when I was in my mid 30's: like being saddened by life and asking "is this all there is?".

I began to realise that I had been going along with what others thought my life should be: did uni and got a good job because that is what my parents/society wanted; bought a house because "I should plan for a family", even though I had no partner. Hell, I hadn't even accepted I was gay, despite having no interest in women, because homosexuality was so reviled. I had been too afraid to rock the boat of society's expectations and risk living my life for me.

I offer my experience FWIW as a cautionary tale. Despite realising what might be wrong, I was too afraid to depart from the safe path despite my misery and made no changes to my life: consequently had a breakdown from the unresolved tension.

Your situation may be totally different, but ask yourself whether any of the things in your life are more to meet someone else's expectations than your own desires.

I have no solutions as resolving my own circumstance is still a work in progress; however, I wish you the courage to change the things you can.
SP - Sun 9 Aug 2009 14:39:56 Replies: 1

Dear SP, That is a very touching and personal response. I wonder how you went about recovering from your crisis and coming to terms with your new, more truthful life.
Morrie - Mon 10 Aug 2009 21:17:59 Replies: 1

Where to go?
I am in my mid 50's from the NSW South Coast and am discovering my bisexuality.Is there a discreet meeting place in the Shoalhaven or will it be necessary for me to travel to Wollongong or further to expand my experiences
- Tue 25 Aug 2009 19:08:33

Morrie, you give me more credit than is due: I'm still recovering and coming to terms with a more truthful life; it's a very slow process for me as I also struggle with health and other issues; overcoming 40+ years of fear is proving harder than I imagined.

My main reason for mentioning my experience is that meeting others' expectations at the expense of one's own desires, whilst feeling safer at the time, can lead to unhappiness in the longer term. It's possible not to even realise this process is happening if it has become ingrained.

It has helped to speak with psychologists and counselors, if only to become more comfortable about revealing what is going on internally for me: something that I always kept masked and, whilst hidden, could not even begin to be addressed. I expect a similar result could be accomplished if able to speak openly with a close friend who knows how to listen and respond non-judgmentally: not something I was able to do, as I had no close friends of that nature.

I think it has also helped to marvel at nature on occasion (sort of stopping to smell the roses) as you realise there is more (incredibly beautiful and wondrous more) out there in the universe than your own narrow-focused issues. I remember stopping to look at a flower on a tree and being captivated by the vibrancy of the colour and the architectural excellence of its form: I was lost in the beauty and awe of the moment, it drew me out of my issues and somehow put them in a different perspective.

I'm not sure whether this is frowned upon, but I intend to place a Pinkboard Personals message (identifier SP) if anyone wants to communicate with me about these or any other topics, outside of the Graffiti Wall.
SP - Mon 31 Aug 2009 11:25:19

I was versitial, [top &/or bottom], until I was 69, [2004], when I had an operation for prostate cancer. This left myself both incontinwent, and mainly impotant. Now 74 years young, my main enjoyment is giving pleasure to those in the 60+ age group, who enjoy mounting myself. You're as old as you as you feel. Which is why I like feeling 18 year olds. :-)
PS I've been gay since I was 14, when a lovely man seduced me in Rushcutter's Bay Park, Sydney. 60 years ago. How time flys when your having fun. For those interested, I now live in Melbourne.
lightningEEP1 - Fri 11 Sep 2009 18:07:39

Yes, I was seduced very easily by a man in his 30s when I was 17. I am eternally grateful to him. I must say at 58 years of age that I have almost zero interest in sex. I'm interested to hear of people older than me who still have that spark. My problem is not with impotence, just interest.
- Sat 12 Sep 2009 23:36:34 Replies: 1

Hair transplants?
What do you guys reckon? anyone seen any success stories? or just bad obvious transplants?
- Tue 13 Oct 2009 22:55:21 Replies: 1, 2, 3

Sorry to hear you've lost most of your interest in sex. As we get older a lot of use go through that phase. Some of it is due to deterorating looks - we tend to get chubby, and some is due to worry about what others may think of us. So what ? Beauty, and ugliness, is only skin deep. It's how you conduct yourself when with others that matters. Not everybody has James Bond's charm. Just be yourself, and let things sort themselves out. If everyone wanted the 100% perfect partner, there'd be a lot of lonely people out there. :-)
lightningEEP1 - Thu 15 Oct 2009 01:05:29

And to think the saying used to be " Vanity thy name is Women " !
Remember if the choice is hair, or brains, pick brains. :-)
lightningEEP1 - Thu 15 Oct 2009 01:08:44 Replies: 1

Why is it vain to want to look good?
Do spray tans count? - Fri 16 Oct 2009 22:15:44 Replies: 1

I have seen a very successful hair transplant which was undetectable and also some obviously recent ones which were noticeable but may have improved with time.

I knew a blond guy in his forties who had no hair on the front third of his head. After transplant he ended up with thinning hair in this area which looked natural and a definite improvement.

The most successful results probably depend on whether you are a good candidate for a transplant. I would be suspicious that some places that do this kind of cosmetic work may be more interested in your money than giving you an honest assessment of your situation.
- Sat 17 Oct 2009 14:56:28

The History and Nature of Male Friendships
If this site is accurate, the nature of male friendships seems to have changed over the past century. I would be happy to turn back the clock.
Craig - Thu 29 Oct 2009 16:43:23

ye just found out streamworks is closed, has it re-opened elsewhere? or is there alternative spots??..grumpy
- Tue 3 Nov 2009 12:39:09 Replies: 1

yeah I visited Melbourne mid October last year and it was closed. Not sure if it was a disappointment because the chances are the place was not well patronised anyway.
- Tue 3 Nov 2009 23:01:12

Why is it vain to want to look good?

I know a guy who isn't even 30 yet, and he's severely bald--so you never see him without a baseball cap.

I don't think it's so much how you perceive yourself, or how others perceive you, but how you perceive that they perceive you.

The baseball cap in question definitely is in need of replacement, but I think it's stapled to his head. I've seen those recent ads for some hair recovery product, but the sad fact is that men grow a thicker membrane in the scalp than do women, and once this kills off the hair (by restricting blood flow), it ain't likely to come back.

a. If you want to keep your existing hair, scrub/massage your scalp thoroughly in the shower to keep up the blood flow.

b. If you're already starting to look like Homer Simpson or Monty Burns, then consider shaving the rest off. A completely bald head doesn't look as "aging" as does a partially bald one.
The Professor Confirmed - Wed 4 Nov 2009 07:02:06

yuppp i had a hair transplant done in Sydney, back in june 2008. before it, i used to wear a hat so much that not even my best mate had seen my head for years.

It was kinda funny, because recently i caught up with him (after my transplant) at the Burswood Casino in Perth. Normally id lie & cry to security to let me with a hat, but i didnt wear it this time.

Anyway, sitting at the blackjack table my mate looked at me said "you havent changed a bit", clearly in reference to my appearance.

bottom line is, remember that its permanent! thats a good thing obviously, but if u dont get it done right the first time, its a really, really bad thing for lots of reasons besides the obvious ones.

okay, so yeah, research who you get to do it first and ask how many procedures that the person doing the procedure on you has done before - most of them will tell you that theyve been in business for 20 yrs, but in actual fact, the surgeon has retired & u get tha new dodgey guy practicing on you instead.

either way, it cost me a sh*tload of money and i dont regret a single cent of it since that day. the procedure only took about 6 hours and that was it fixed. only my mum noticed something different, mainly because she was the one that spent years convincing me my hair looked fine - in the good kinda way, like mums do..
- Thu 19 Nov 2009 00:16:19

Flash Mob Youtube
Does anyone know title/band for 'bang, bang ' song ?
- Fri 20 Nov 2009 22:34:20

Steamworks was grotty and filthy. No regrets.
- Sat 21 Nov 2009 09:04:43 Replies: 1

Getting in early - Christmas & New Year
A Happy Christmas, and a Merry New Year's Eve to all on this board.
May all your meetings bring you joy, pleasure, and satisfaction.
But remember one thing over the Festive Season - If you drink, and drive, you're a bloody idiot
lightningEEP1 - Thu 3 Dec 2009 20:31:29

Was O.K. in the 70's & 80's, but started going downhill in the early 90's, so I stopped going there.
An alternate venue is Bayside Sauna in Glenhuntley Road, Elsterwick.
Or " The Shed " in Seaford.
lightningEEP1 - Thu 3 Dec 2009 20:35:24

I used to go to Steamworks when I came down to Melbourne. Even though it was old and dirty, I like the fact that there were many rooms and many levels to explore.

However, my favourite is still Subway, right under the railway tracks. I hope that it is still there.
sydboy - Thu 3 Dec 2009 23:27:50 Replies: 1

60 Year old
Does anybody know of places in Melbourne I could meet same age guys like me . Bar/club /Sauna ?.
- Fri 4 Dec 2009 21:41:47 Replies: 1

Try the web site - silverdaddies
Also some mature men go to Bayside Sauna
Best of luck, and satisfation :-) , in your search.
lightningEEP1 - Sat 5 Dec 2009 20:08:05

60 year old
Thanks for the info I will try a visit to Bayside.
- Mon 7 Dec 2009 21:09:08

Yes Subway is there, that's where I went after finding the Steamworks door shut and a sign on the door saying it had closed down
- Tue 8 Dec 2009 19:36:45

Bitchy /Gossipy Guys
The guys in Adelaide are doing my head in. So bitchy and gossipy and they seem to be everywhere and know everyone. I totally understand why so many people move from this state now! The sad thing is these bitches are in all the local gay groups and gay websites and all they do is gossip and bitch. I dont get why anyone wants anything to do with them.
overit - Fri 11 Dec 2009 08:59:19 Replies: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5
This is the opinion of the poster.

Go Adelaide
- Fri 11 Dec 2009 17:12:18

Not every gay person in Adelaide is like this surely? Are youi over-generalising? Have you explored other options e.g. community, volunteer groups? Worth a try if you haven't. Good luck. Adelaide people might have more suggstions.
- Tue 15 Dec 2009 22:07:20

For some reason I don't understand, these individuals adopt this kind of lifestyle and make a career of being gay. Could it be a reaction to discrimination they encounter?

What they end up doing is putting up more barriers between themselves and the rest of society.
- Wed 16 Dec 2009 06:32:35

I just recently went to Adelaide and the best place to pick up was in the sauna. The guys there seemed relaxed and friendly. However, when it came to meeting guys off the net, nearly all were bi. I want to know, is Adelaide the bi capital of Australia?
sydboy - Thu 17 Dec 2009 08:28:03

My experience of Adelaide is from over 10 years ago. From memory, yes, you do come across more bi guys there than in Melbourne or Sydney and yes, people are really friendly. I think bi men outnumber gays in most cities. You meet them in different circles in Adelaide because it is a smaller place. I did not meet bitchy people. I have only pleasant memories of Adelaide.
- Thu 17 Dec 2009 11:00:36 Replies: 1

I'm just back from a holiday inSouth Australia and it was really how striking how friendly people were - much more than in Sydney and Melbourne.
- Sat 19 Dec 2009 08:55:58

I think you are over-generalizing. I find that there is a certain "gay-advertising" behavior that I find annoying; but seriously, you must look at your own behavior too. No matter where my Muthur lives, she always has problems with noisy neighbors. It just doesn't occur to her that she's super-sensitive to noise.

By the same token, perhaps you are super-sensitive to bitches and see them everywhere as a result. I've been to Adelaide and, like other posters, found it to be a wonderful and friendly place--although I must admit at that time (and age), I had no interaction with the gay scene.

If you can only find bitches in Adelaide then, unfortunately, you will only find bitches in Sydney, Melbourne or Brisbane.

I can promise you there are plenty of nice gay guys out there who aren't bitches or gossips. Rather than looking at the problem as geographical, look at it as sociological: change the clubs you visit; change your own outlook towards people--if someone starts giving you shit, just change the subject. If there are genuine bitches in your phone book, just delete them and move on. Concentrate on the few non-bitches, and build your social network from there.

There are two things in my own life that really piss me: hypocrisy and bureaucratic idiocy. As a result, I see them everywhere--which brings me to the reason I paid a visit to make a posting:

All over ZDnet, there has been debate back and forth about the Christian Right-Wing intent to force ISPs to filter all Australian internet access.

While it's perfectly reasonable to block KP in a country in which it is unacceptable, are people concerned that sites like this board, "pornotube", "redtube" (?) will subject to the same censorship, particularly considering that the "blacklist" will not be published?

Do people think Conroy's "bill" will lead to further censorship? Will ISPs be expected to "net nanny" every instance of the word se*, f***, and ##s? As net users, paying premium prices for sloppy speed compared to other countries, do we tolerate further delays and government-imposed blockages?

I remember as child that other kids at school would be passing "dirty magazines" around. Is not the internet just a bigger playground that parents should be supervising instead of the government?
The Professor Confirmed - Sat 19 Dec 2009 19:38:07 Replies: 1, 2

So much for fresh ideas and new beginnings....Krudd seems to have taken a leaf out of china's human rights. He has again stifled free speech.
What really gets me is the stupid people out there that always vote labor. If the libs had done this there would be community outrage.
just think for yourselves - Sun 20 Dec 2009 09:13:45 Replies: 1

"What really gets me is the stupid people out there that always vote labor....If the libs had done this....."

So just as 'stupid' as the 'stupid' people that always vote Liberal I guess...Howard was going to do it too :)
just think - Sun 20 Dec 2009 11:40:40 Replies: 1, 2, 3

That's correct and a sure bet that Tony Abbott his loyal offsider would do the same...

Just think if he gets into power, we will all be required to mandatorily attend Christian churches on Sunday!!!

There will be no such thing as recognition of gay marriage/equal rights.

Kiss that goodbye if Abbott becomes PM!!!
- Sun 20 Dec 2009 15:24:18

You say you think bi men outnumber gays in most cities. That is something I have never heard before. What makes you think this. Please tell us how you meet so many.
- Mon 21 Dec 2009 10:06:35 Replies: 1

What's with all that American spelling?
- Tue 22 Dec 2009 15:27:27 Replies: 1

CD / TG in melbourne
Just in Melb and cant find anything like Sydney has down here. If Im after those on the game that easy enuff, but where oh where do they hang?
- Tue 22 Dec 2009 17:18:40 Replies: 1

What's with all that American spelling?

It's not "American", it's derived from pre-American colonial before "bougois" spellings were introduced in Britain and subsequently inherited by the Australian colony.

Americans and Australians have it equally wrong, e.g.:

US: realize and recognize;
OZ: realise and recognise;
Mine: Realize and recognise.

To determine if it is ~ise or ~ize, look at how the word can be extended. ~ization: realization, but not recognization--recognition, so it stays an ~ise.

Synthesis cannot become "synthisization", so it's "synthesise".

The letter U does not belong in color, favor, etc.. Even Shakespeare is reprinted without the "U" in these words, because they were written before the unorthodox modification.

I believe Latin should be re-introduced to schools so that people have an understanding of word derivatives.

It was the late Arthur C. Clarke's belief that mass communications would bring cohesion to the language, but unfortunately it has resulted in further fragmentation with such hideous developments as "fess up" and "Are you dissin' me?"

The day Fowler's Guide to Good English approves the sentence, "I never dunn nuthin'," then I will know the English language is doomed to exinction.

I read a story of a teacher explaining "double negatives", such that "I never dunn nuthin'," actually means the person has done something. The teacher pointed out that there was no example of a double positive being used to mean a negative, to which a student responded, "Yeah, right!"
The Professor Confirmed - Thu 24 Dec 2009 00:06:42 Replies: 1

Proforma Response: I've no direct [knowledge][experience][understanding] of <insert topic>, not withstanding here is my 2 cents worth expanded to a totally irrelevant dissertation.
- Thu 24 Dec 2009 12:23:30

Your link to The Australian is very valuable. It demonstrates that both Labor and Liberal are far-Right of center. There is no Left Wing in Australian politics any more.

I am fortunate that where I now live both Representatives (State and Federal) are Independent.

The concern with Conroy's proposal is that ISPs will be responsible for filtering, and adults will face the same restrictions imposed on them "for their own good" that are devised by narrow-minded 19th-Century thinking.

If adults want to access "Pornotube" why shouldn't they? This debate has informed me of legitimate adult sites that I never knew existed.

As far as I'm aware, the illegal stuff (kiddie-porn, etc.) isn't usually hosted on sites, but swapped and transferred through file-sharing networks established by a "closed circle". Therefore this legislation will mean the government is peeking into everyone's bit-torrents and fileshares, along with scanning emails.

A random scan of my own computer is highly unlikely to find any porn images at all--but the amount of data that I have that is classified as "pseudo-science", and other research that I have could see me arrested as a "political dissident".

We know that China's net-censorship is politically-motivated. How long before the "net-nanny State" turns into an Orwellian one?
The Professor Confirmed - Have a great Christmas anyway! - Thu 24 Dec 2009 20:20:31

Prof, where does the rule about -ise and -ize come from? Did you make it up yourself? I like it.
Morrie - Mon 28 Dec 2009 09:16:26 Replies: 1, 2

Actually, I have no proof that bi men outnumber gays. It may depend on definitions. I have found that many men I know have at some time, either before or during a marriage, apparently had a sexual relationship with another guy. Perhaps it is just that I know more married guys than gay ones.

Generally through work, I have had good friends who are not obviously gay and are married or dating women, who, in some way have disclosed to me they take an interest in the gay scene. Sometimes, on business or sports trips, I have heard conflicting stories from each of two male friends, which I took to be an effort to cover up that they spent time together in a hotel room. If they were just talking, why would they bother with the stories? A friend told me that two friends of his had been lovers since student days. I didn't tell him one happened to be the married brother of an acquaintance of mine. A guy I work with tried to use me to relay phone messages from another guy to arrange meetings so the woman he lived with would think the messages related to work. After seeing these guys together, I could see why she was worried. These examples come to mind at the moment. There are also personal experiences i could mention, but that's another story.
- Tue 29 Dec 2009 18:57:32 Replies: 1

>> Did you make it up yourself?

Walter Mitty would have trouble making up as much as this character.
- Wed 30 Dec 2009 14:58:24

Many so called contact sites only want your money.
One site I've joined recently is :-
Lots of oldies looking for younger, younger looking for older, oldies looking for oldies.
Imeet several people on this site, and had sex with three of them.
Not bad, considering I only joined it in mid-December 2009 !
lightningEEP1 - Wed 30 Dec 2009 21:34:19 Replies: 1

Prof, where does the rule about -ise and -ize come from? Did you make it up yourself? I like it.

No, Morrie. I deduced it through indepth analysis. I have only "devised" it in this simplified form for general use and explanation.

Center, Meter (as device for meting/measuring), Metre as the SI unit. Unsure about Theatre/Theater at this time.

PS: The Walter Mitty comparison has been made before. I know it's meant to be pejorative--but for the education of that poster:

Singer was having a great deal of trouble devising his sewing machine. One night he dreamt he was on a tropical island being attacked by savages with spears that had holes through the spearheads. This is where he got the idea to put the thread hole at the point of the needle instead of dragging it through the tail as is done with a hand-held needle.

What's the point of learning something in one part of your life if you're not allowed to apply it to other parts of your life?
The Professor Confirmed - Happy New Year to All !!! - Fri 1 Jan 2010 14:25:33

But Lightning, was the quality of the sex as good as the quantity? The only two times I had sex with guys I'd met on an internet site (Pinkboard actually) it was horrid. I only went through with it because it seemed rude to say I wasn't interested after all the hot emails.
Morrie - Sat 2 Jan 2010 09:05:43 Replies: 1

It's very difficult to accurately put a number on how many bi men there are in this country due to the stigma surrounding sexuality.
- Sat 2 Jan 2010 23:45:26 Replies: 1

The Australian Bisexual Network makes this claim on their site

According to various surveys and studies at least thirty percent of sexually active people admit to some form of bisexual behaviour.
- Mon 4 Jan 2010 11:46:35

The quality was great. So great, that shortly I'm having repeat performances with them. :-)
What more could one ask ?
Incidently, we first meet for a coffee, and talk, to check out each others suitablility, interests, and requirements.
lightningEEP1 - Mon 4 Jan 2010 17:28:13

In February I will be having extensive dental surgery, so I figured that while I'm still in a stupor I'll get some piercings.

We've discussed ears before, but does left or right have any alleged meaning when applied to eyebrows and nipples?
- Mon 4 Jan 2010 22:10:22

I doubt that any dentist will permit piercings to be done in their premises while you are under an anaesthetic.
- Tue 5 Jan 2010 07:13:03 Replies: 1

Not quite what I had in mind. While still "stupid", I get person who should be driving me home to go via piercing salon. And if I've pre-paid then I've made my intentions clear.

If I'm lucky, then when I get home, maybe he will really will drive me home.

All I want to know if there's any construed meaning in choice of sides.
- Tue 5 Jan 2010 17:50:29 Replies: 1

Please please please don't go ahead with this. You should be fully aware of what is happening when you have piercings. Don't place trust in people you don't know well.
- Tue 5 Jan 2010 23:25:14 Replies: 1

Thanks for the concern.

By "stupid" I mean conscious, but still under the influence of the drugs. I'm a real chicken when it comes to inflicted pain. But like tattoos, piercings are addictive. And I know that they have to be careful doing an eyebrow because theres a nerve running underneath.

I've also read up on nipples, and there are some horrible photos of double-piercings, because the nipple swells after the first piercing and then they do a second behind the first. So I want them to go deep enough the first time that once it swells it's in the right place. The place is a specialist piercing salon not some hair dresser who uses a stud-gun.

I've even considered a prince albert, but other posts have made it pretty clear that I dont want to go there.

So, left or right? The net is pretty wishy-washy so I want an Australian answer to the question.
- Wed 6 Jan 2010 18:10:15 Replies: 1


The very first photo is "double" because of nipple-growth, and I don't like the look of it either.

I know this person because he's been posting from my network. (That's what you get for leaving your bookmarks open!)

Pierce, for want of a better name, has thought this through. When he asked "Left or Right?", I couldn't answer and said JFGI (Just F'g Google It).

I'm guessing, even though not yet asked, that I'm the "driver" in the equation, but I don't think the driving home is really on the agenda (at least I hope he was joking), because I like responsive partners.

Years ago in Sydney I got my left nipple pierced without anaesthetic and it really f'g hurt! There are so many nerves in the nipple, and apparently the male's nipple is more sensitive in this regard than the female's. I actually went into shock and they had to stop--so the piercing was left to heel up and it never entertained a decoration. It took about three months for this to stabilize and start to feel "normal again".

As Pierce's dental surgery includes the removal of metal fillings, I certainly wouldn't be recommending tongue, lip or other intra-oral piercings because metal in a moist environment is promoting a galvanic reaction, which would totally waste the expense of having the metal fillings replaced. Even gold which is virtually inert would still present this problem, so I personally recommend that people use plastic retainers, and where the piercing is from inside to outside (Librette?) then put the metal cap on the outside. You also want to make sure that any such piercings are well into the gum area to avoid collision with the teeth. Tongues pierced too close to the tip are the worst offenders for chipping teeth.

As I also value my teeth I'm not likely to consider intra-oral piercings. The dentist was disgusted with my teeth. He said if every 44-year* old turned up at the surgery with teeth in the condition that mine were, he would be out of business. *Yes, I've finally revealed my bio-age--for this regeneration, anyway :)

Having found these posts, I will be discussing with Pierce his full intentions, and promise people here that I will be "looking over the shoulder" so that a trusted person is making sure he gets what he wants.

I can understand the logic. Piercing salons are not allowed to administer even a local anaesthetic, yet the practitioners are better trained (and often far more hygienic) than any medic. It also means healing time co-incides with the healing of the dental work. I think this makes sense.

Even though I've been around this board for years now, I never admitted to my Father that I was "gay". From his own upbringing it would have broken is heart. He understood that I was never going to give him grandkids. As my sister already did so, I'm not too worried--but since his passing in April I've gradually been creeping out into one of the local enclave groups, but I don't have to put up a big sign "Hey, I'm out of the closet now!" It seems a shame that I have had to wait until losing a parent to start to become my real self, but at least I've had feedback from the "next level" that he now understands.

He's right about piercing being addictive--but so far I'm still only restricted to the ears. 6L, 3R totalling 9--I mean once I got to 8, I had to add the parity bit! So if ever I'm in one of those fights that I carefully avoid and someone rips off my left ear it will look like a postage stamp.

Because of metabolic changes due to stress and grief, my own teeth now need work: the wisdom teeth have shattered; and why the f are they called "Wisdom" teeth??? This will most likely involve hospitalization, so I can't use the same idea as Pierce.

I've also seen the trend of people disproportionaly enlarging the holes with other objects. I saw one guy in Sydney whom I swear was wearing the hubs from Brother typewriter ribbons through his earlobes. This is a one-way choice. If, later in life, he decides to chuck it in that's a whole hole that ain't gonna disappear buddy!

The closest I've gotten to "hole enlargement" is linking three rings together so that they roll over each other like Lady Diana's wedding ring in the same hole. This also has the advantage that you can get antiseptics in through the gaps and also a total of 27 individual rings!

I had to chuck all the Sterling Silver ones because on my body they tarnish badly within only a couple of days. I've another friend in Sydney who can't wear gold--his body "eats" it!

I also went net-hunting as to Left vs Right, and found that the Left ear is "gay". so it must vary from country to country, because in Australia it was always the Right ear that was "gay".

I found equal and opposite information regarding nose rings. I found a forum where someone asked the exact same question, "does which nipple or eyebrow have specific meaning, and what is it?"; to see answers like, "no it doesn't matter," alongside authoritarian posts saying "Yes, it does have meaning," but then failing to give any explanation.

So if someone out there can "Australian cultural" significance to which side to choose, it will hopefully get Pierce of my computer and onto my back.

I also note an absence of comment on Conroy's proposal. Should I have posted this in Equality?
The Professor Confirmed - Wed 6 Jan 2010 22:47:36 Replies: 1

I am opposed to the filter. I urge you to read to find out more about how this can be used by the government to censor the Internet.
Panther Confirmed - Thu 7 Jan 2010 08:19:49 Replies: 1

The site says basically what I've said all along--those who are really breaking the law with kiddy-porn do so in closed circles that are impossible to filter realistically.

Back in the early 90s I was asked if I break PGP encryption on suspect files. I advised that PGP was deliberately written with no back door access, and that I would need to scan the actual hard disc to recover any deleted images that still existed from having been viewed--they gave me a CD copy of the drive: useless because it had not copied the "blank" sectors.

In doing my own research last night prior to my post regarding Pierce, half of the sites visited would qualify to be "blocked" under this Orwellian legislation. None of them were "porn" but, yes, some were not "child-appropriate".

While my Nephew was living with me, we had a simple rule. He was allowed to download "topless" female images (he's mad about Amanda Tapping/Samantha Carter from Stargate) because that's what teenagers are going to do anyway. He knew that if I did a routine scan of his activities and found anything more "indecent", his hard drive would be wiped without warning.

Interestingly, we only had two occasions of viral infection on his machine:

1. His birthday, when friends tried to access porn-sites that they weren't permitted at home;

2. His sister accessing an innocent looking SIM-type game that concluded with a couple bonking! She admitted to playing this game TWICE, but then made allegations against my Nephew, which had to be reported to the police.

While I was "cleaning up" the machine, I discovered that this virus was deleting records of its presence, so I was copying everything to a thumb-drive. The police then seized the computer, and I gave very explicit instructions on what was going on, where to plug all the bits in and where the data was stored--they cocked it up and destroyed the evidence!

The original idea of a filter program optionally loaded onto a PC directly is far more workable, because you get that PC to check with a known "child-lock" database before accessing a site.

I run AVG, and it does the same thing with viruses. When you do a Google Search, it flags sites that are known to contain malicious code. So it makes sense to me to have a similar program running under the browser, or JavaScript loaded into the browser that blocks such content.

Kids are always two steps ahead of adults when it comes to technology, and those who want to bypass the ISP filter will find a way.
The Professor Confirmed - Thu 7 Jan 2010 11:05:14 Replies: 1

I agree - but what can we do? I'm told by reliable sources that writing letters or emails to politicians is a waste of time.
Morrie - Fri 8 Jan 2010 07:53:05 Replies: 1

I only raised this topic here because a valuable resource like this site is one of the first things we could lose. The whole IT community is up in arms about it because it is a threat to "net-neutrality" and from a technological viewpoint an expensive exercise in futility.

Protestors set up a site called
and it has already come under attack which demonstrates that the true motives behind this are political, not moral. Note that it is not an "au" domain name, so Australian authorities have no legal control over it.

Emails and letters do achieve something. Remember the recent blast all over the news about Senator Xenophon suggesting a Senate Inquiry into Scientology?

If Panther permits, I'll post the entire list of publicly accessible Minsterial and Senate email addresses.
The Professor Confirmed - Fri 8 Jan 2010 19:16:02 Replies: 1, 2

I won't be going ahead with it.
After all the searches I did and what the Prof dug up for me, I went to the piercing salon and found that it had closed.

I spose I'll have to pluck up some real courage in the next town I visit. At least the Prof can watch over me for a few more weeks.
"Pierce" - Fri 8 Jan 2010 19:29:33


I don't think it is appropriate to post all the email addresses here. Please instead post a link to where these addresses can be found.

Here is another link:
Panther Confirmed - Sat 9 Jan 2010 09:22:41

Emails are not easily listed.
The APH site requires you to navigate around to each "member page", there is no compiled list, visit here

You will find all the Senators listed in the OP, and all the Ministers listed in post 24.
The Professor Confirmed - Sat 9 Jan 2010 12:36:44

And another link
The Professor Confirmed - Sat 9 Jan 2010 19:59:15

This is what I wrote:
Dear Mr Conroy,

I am writing this personally to you. I am not flooding other MPs or Senators with emails, as plenty of people are doing that already.

Below is the bulk of a post that I made on a site that may well be blocked by your proposed legislation.

[QUOTED POST OF Thu 7 Jan 2010 11:05:14]

Because of the police issues and the passing of my Father, my Nephew no longer lives with me. At his new School he has learned way too much about computer coding.

When I was at school, the kids used to pass round "dirty" magazines. I was raised "puritanically" as a Jehovah's Witness and was literally too afraid to look at such material, and was horrified to find the filthiest parts of a magazine hidden in my own school bag. I handed that material in immediately, but had no idea as to why it was put into my bag at all (maybe the guilty party thought it was a good hiding place). At that age, I should not have been traumatized by close-up photos of female genitalia--as a member of the human species I should have been interested in them!

Most educational institutions already have filters on their systems to keep online usage within the educational guidelines. If you were to seriously poll the local administrators of these networks, you would find out what a nightmare it is to keep everything locked down. To add this MANDATORY burden to ISPs when Australians are already paying too much for too little is going to be a very expensive exercise in technological futility.

The highly publicized extra-ordinary take-down of "" demonstrates to the public that filtering is politically motivated rather than morally. Whether this is true or not has no effect on the public's perception of it.

P2P file share programs are already moving to built-in encryption to prevent ISPs from eavesdropping. This is not just in Australia, but began in the u.s. because of ARIA/RIAA's over-zealous tactics on file sharing of music and video. I am sure you will remember the Napster events well. Napster was not making any money out of hosting file-sharing--it was making its money from the advertisers on the site. If RIAA had gone after the advertisers instead of the users, the site would have dried up and disappeared.

A routine scan of my computer would not show anything pornographic or illegal (all my MP3s are ripped from original discs and have a coded name to identify exactly which CD), but it would certainly show that I regularly access and discuss sexually and politically sensitive topics. There was an embarrassing period when trying to access "" automatically diverted people to a bestiality forum, and there was a mad flurry of emails and phone calls to alert the site-administrator of the issue. This sort of hack would not be detected by your filter-proposal.

I warn you well in advance: The implementation of a mandatory filter is an open invitation to every hack-minded teenager out there to break it. The Chinese filter is bypassed far more often than the Chinese government is going to admit.

I also advise that as none of my own activities on the internet are illegal, if I should encounter any blocking I will be filing protests under the International Charter of Human Rights. We live in an alleged "democracy" which gives us the "right to dissent".

If your concern is genuinely limited to the protection of children, then I urge you to look into Howard's original idea of an OPTIONAL program freely available for parents to instal on child-accessable computers. If, on the other hand, your aim is a "moral crusade" for what you consider to be the "public good" I suggest you resign now because the public backlash will end your political career.

Please do not construe any of the above as personal threats but rather, consider it a dose of reality.

And oblige,


Please do not waste paper using the above postal address. I have included it so that you can verify that I am a real person and a registered voter. I prefer email responses to: **********************
The Professor Confirmed - Letters do work. - Sun 10 Jan 2010 17:20:51

Actually it isn't the silly pollies doing this, it's the overbearing, overpowerfull, canberra beaurocrats.
The pollies just do whatever the beauocrats tell them to do. Mainly because they can't think for themselves. :-0
lightningEEP1 Confirmed - Tue 12 Jan 2010 14:55:23 Replies: 1

Conroy has a bug up his arse about censoring the net. Curious though that when he and his wife couldn't access whatever reproductive service that they used to gain a child because it was illegal in their home state, they went to another state to basically buy a baby. Seems government knows best in all aspects of peoples lives except when it impacts on him personally.
- Wed 13 Jan 2010 16:18:23 Replies: 1

Conroy has a bug up his arse about censoring the net. Curious though that when he and his wife couldn't access whatever reproductive service that they used to gain a child because it was illegal in their home state, they went to another state to basically buy a baby. Seems government knows best in all aspects of peoples lives except when it impacts on him personally.

Why do you think people visit Canberra? That's where all the X-rated material is available!

Here is how the Chinese filter works re "tiananmen square protest" (Courtesy of ZDnet):,139033349,339300363,00.htm


1984 Chinese Revision of History
The Professor Confirmed - Thu 14 Jan 2010 13:06:31 Replies: 1

If you oppose The Filter sign the petition at
Panther Confirmed - Thu 21 Jan 2010 08:06:02

Vote smart!
I've previously admitted to being raised with a Labor bias--Putting all that behind me and only taking into account recent events:

The use of Military personnel by the Howard government during the artificial wharf crisis was in violation of the Australian Constitution.

Although Meg Lees has been dumped the Democrats are still comprosmised over the GST.

Turnbull is a merchant banker, and will sell whatever of Australia that is still left--including citizens.

We know that regardless of our vote either Labor or Liberal will hold office--and it would seem at this time that Labor is the slightly less of two evils.

Use your vote to send a very precise message. For your local representative, choose your preference. DO NOT BE INFLUENCED by "how to vote cards"--vote your preferences as YOU want them.

In my case, both State and Federal:

Independent (who will decimate the rest)
Greens (balance of power)
Labor (back up)
Everyone else I've never heard of.
Liberal (You must make a point of defining the LAST number)



Again, vote independents first
Now work your way through the Labor Candidates and deliberately OMIT CONroy.
Work through all the groups you've never heard of then, then the Liberals, then the FAR-FAR-FAR-FAR-right--just make sure that if Fred or Elaine Nile is number 166, that you mark Stephen Conroy as number 165. The objective is to "punish" the member, not the party sheep.

PS: Take a pen with you for voting, and make your numbers very clear. Pencils (as supplied) can be altered and this has been exposed in the past.

Perhaps Panther can set up a 2010 election year list of known Senate candidates at this time and we can sort them according to religious bigotry.

Naturally, as we want to expunge the curse of $cientology from ANZO, we still have to keep Senator Nick Xenophon near the top of the list.

I realize that neither Xenophon nor Conroy may actually be represented in this coming election--so the list will have to mark the closest allies of these representatives.

I have cast aside much mental conditioning, and my only leaning to Labor is that it is the "lesser of two evils".

We have to make our votes say "OK, we accept that you will maintain power under the one-party-masquerading-as-two system, but your certainty of maintaining that power is seriously being undermined by independents who actually represent their constituents' interests.
The Professor Confirmed - Fri 22 Jan 2010 22:24:03 Replies: 1

I'm in Simon Crean's electorate, and voted for him, to give the Labor Party Machine a virtual kick up the arse, for trying to replace him.
Democrats ? Not really democratic.
Independants ? How interdepent - where do they get their money from, to stand for election ?
Liberal ? Now adays there seems to be no difference between them and Labor.
Both Menzies, and Chiefly, must be spinning in their grave.
It's the beauocrats in Canberra that have myself worried. They just dictate to the pollies what to do.
Anyway that's enough politics for now.
Back to the nitty gritty
Any one, besides myself, been getting much lately ?
The way the weather been behaving, I would image both beats, and beaches, have been out.
Hands up those who have been to a sauna/bar/club lately.
lightningEEP1 Confirmed - Sun 24 Jan 2010 18:48:27

"So just as 'stupid' as the 'stupid' people that always vote Liberal I guess...Howard was going to do it too "

So if Howard was going to do it , it gives K-Rudd and his government a free pass to do it also?,

Hmmm so vote labor again is acceptable as they are not responsible or accountable for decisions they make if they copy liberal policy.
revolution in government is just spin - Wed 27 Jan 2010 04:10:03 Replies: 1

Nope. This policy, whether it be from Labor or Liberal, is unacceptable. Don't vote for either party.
- Thu 28 Jan 2010 15:00:56 Replies: 1

People have their own right to decide for whom they wish to vote on Election Day.

I am simply advise that those who still wish to stick with Labor place Independent candidates higher on your list, then Labor (as the lesser of the two fish-odorous parties), but make sure that you deliberately put Senator CONroy right at the bottom of the Senate paper.

Independents don't have to toe a party line so they are free to represent the true concerns of their electorates--it's also in there best interests to represent those constituents properly, because they can't rely on "pre-selection" to be guaranteed a seat.

I only cite Labor as a preference on the grounds that I have given above. If people have a preference for Liberal, then by all means follow my example and swap Labor and Liberal around--just be absolutely sure that you give Indepents first preferences on your vote. Even if the major party candidate gets in, he knows it's "only just" scraped through, and sends a big wake-up call to our so-called "representaives"
The Professor Confirmed - A government should live in fear of its constituency--not the other way around. - Fri 29 Jan 2010 23:50:32

More Links,130061791,339301119,00.htm?ocid=nl_TNB_16022010_fea_l1
- Tue 16 Feb 2010 19:07:32

When I lived in St. Kilda, in the 1970's & 80;s, The Ritz in Fitzroy Street used to be their haunt. Perhaps you could try there.
lightningEEP1 Confirmed - Wed 17 Feb 2010 14:54:33

"Pierce" has moved on.
This evening, I said good-bye to Pierce as he board a bus to his next destination--and in the end neither have added to the number of extra holes added to our bodies. He got his teeth done at the dentist--I have to wait up to two years to have mine done in hospital...

I know we would have kept in touch, but when I got back home, guess whose PDA I found... and it's passworded, so I can't even get word to his parents where it is! ALWAYS put a DYMO label on the back with a phone number that doesn't appear inside the PDA or mobile phone.

I guess I'm paying a visit to the board now to ask about different opinions on relationships.

We knew:

a) Our relationship was convenient--saved him packet in hotal fees by boarding him in my spare room, and as far anyone else was concerned that's it: he was renting.
b) It was discreet (because of the town's non-professive thinking).
c) As a "relationship" it would terminate when he decided to continue with his travels.
d) Except for difficulty in contact (because of the PDA), I'm sure that the friendship will endure.

So without running a formal survey what's your preference?
a) casual, may we never meet again
b) casual, but lets make a friendship out of it, view to relationship
c) I want a real relationship up front
d) Real friends are more important, where I get my root doesn't matter.

With Mardis Gras descending upon us shortly (like now), I'm sure that many people will cross categories. That's OK. I'm asking what's your CORE philosophy, and are there any I've (probably) missed?

With Pierce I think I will be remembered more for the friendship--I don't think I'm going to rate too highly on the A-Z of roots. Passion and caring, yes--physical endurance, no.

I would like to delude myself that the Friendship part was strong enough for Pierce to stay, but he's backpacking and has all his travel arranged--see the world while you're young instead of retiring and discovering you can't afford it!

So, I'm asking people to honestly describe their feelings regarding casual vs committed; friends vs fuck buddies; foursomes and moresomes--your feelings, not those that Stephen CONroy's mind police would make you feel.

I know there are people in "committed" relationships who still nip out to the nearest beat for a bit extra.

I know there are people who've used "dating sites" and been robbed blind.

I kow there are people who met on beats, and it was "love at first sight"

So can we get some discussion going on who is what relationship "type" what sort of relationship you're in now. Will you and a long-term partner openly (and hosestly) leap at a few casual flings during Grand Tuesday?
The_Professor - Unsigned because there are too many tardises (tardii?) onscreen already. - Sun 7 Mar 2010 02:02:45 Replies: 1

hey prof
I'm in a committed relationship which sometimes has threesomes etc but I also confess I'm a bit of a beat addict.
I probably do not think the relationship will last forever sometimes I wish my partner would dump me.
Sexually we are reasonably compatible though no sparks fly or images of galloping horses come to mind.
Is it bad for me to wish my partner had a bigger penis?
chad - Sun 14 Mar 2010 04:34:54 Replies: 1

Nothing is perfect in this world. I for one has a near perfect partner, we are very compatible. Have been together over 5 years. I would call it a good relationship, no dramas, no arguements. However, I am more adventurous when comes to sex. That is when the sex buddies roles come in. I fulfilled my sexual needs with other people without having fallen in love. We both have a open minded when comes to things like this. It works for us.

No point to dump your partner because he has a small penis, just have casual/ on going sex buddies with larger penises!!!
- Sun 14 Mar 2010 12:34:32

Personals sites
I have had a few queries about alternative Personals sites for people to use once Pinkboard Personals has closed. I am unable to recommend any as I haven't used any for ages, not even Pinkboard. Does anybody have suggestions? It is OK to post the address of the site.
Panther Confirmed - Mon 15 Mar 2010 20:37:47 Replies: 1

Well the main ones would be or
- Mon 15 Mar 2010 21:11:14 Replies: 1

I like
- Sun 21 Mar 2010 10:05:16

Re: Personal Sites

Bi/Gay/TS/TV/CD (you can only reply to one message a day without paying) should be operational again in April

- Tue 30 Mar 2010 08:00:17

Re: Personal Sites
B&D Sites
- Tue 30 Mar 2010 08:04:27 Replies: 1

Replacement for you boys to hang out next
I am going to create one I think on

Please register to newsletter so that I could email you once I got it setup on the website ?

- Wed 31 Mar 2010 18:07:25 Replies: 1

Pinkboard has not closed, just a few sections.

Feel free to hang around here still. Maybe we can even get something happening.
Panther Confirmed - Wed 31 Mar 2010 21:50:10

Looking for Speaking Lessons (MELB)
Does anyone know of a tutor or place that I could get lessons in speaking. I have done a few course but am looking for direction in project my voice, better pronunciation etc ....
- Thu 1 Apr 2010 13:35:56 Replies: 1

Try looking under speech therapy in the yellow pages.
Or perhaps under elocution [have I spelt that right ?], also in yellow pages.
hth :-)
lightningEEP1 Confirmed - Fri 9 Apr 2010 04:00:57

Just as I'm having personal crises, so is my computer, and it reset back to the beginning of the thread, and as attitudes have changed (mine and others), I thought I would plant yet another rant: Non-fen feel free to move on.

Re: Morrie - Fri 12 Dec 2008 23:11:53
What drugs you getting in Northern NSW Professor :)
     I hardly got a word out of that post :)
but 43 ! my my what I would do if I was 43 ! I just turned 53 my dear ! I know you are not well but I get to the gym 4 times a week, walk 2 times a week. Not heavy weights etc as I only weigh 65kg but I am nice and taut.
Walking keeps the love hands and that dreadful little pot belly that appears now and again.
     What part of Northern NSW ? We are headed to Lismore for Tropical Fruits and just busting for a week away up North driving around and doing whatever/whoever I please.
     Mind you I wouldnt pick me out of a crowd either :) but at least being toned with a reasonable chest there are some guys who love to lick it :) which gets me going in an instant.
     It aint over for me yet !
- Mon 15 Dec 2008 07:21:58

On April 21 last year, my Father passed away and it crushes me that I had to wait for his passing to even start "coming out" in a more public manner. So Morrie, if you want a hitch-hiker for your next trip to Lismore, Panther has my email.

Re: Its not over until you're dead
     Yep am the 53 yr old as mentioned in previous post.
     Sex and age wise has never worried me so long as they were legal :) so didnt care if I got off with an 18 or 50 year old etc ( this was when say in my late 20's/30's)but now I get more of the younger guys catching my eye and scoring a few etc and not sure what to think. As in its obvious they are into the mature/daddy look and then I think what the ! I am mature/daddy kind !!!!!!!!!
hahahahahahahaaaaaaa but then I think get over it. Nothing like a nice taught young bod to fondle.
     No relationship yet but would like one. Like the other poster ie younger and very very very rich and oh well endowed would be a pleaser as well :)
- Sun 21 Dec 2008 11:06:38

Given that my physical appearance is highly deceptive--I look much: younger, richer, lighter, fitter (ha ha ha ...) than I really am, I do feel "age trapped" and bound by stereotypes.
     OK, so "Pierce" broke all those rules, being half my age and there are anomalies in our meeting in the first place:
- How he wound up so far geographically off-track;
- How I wound up in a pub (I don't drink) to meet him;
- How the sexuality thing came up in a conservative country town.
     If he could have afforded to stay in Oz or been allowed to work it would have been great. Would it have worked out long-term? I don't know, but it couldn't have been worse than any of the hetero relationships I've already tried. (Yes, he did get in contact, and his PDA posted to him--I copied the memory chip. I don't have the password so I still can't read anything, but it makes a nice memento.)

Re: Its not over until you're dead
     A good friend in his twenties formed a happy relationship with a successful and much older man. He was always mature for his age and it seemed to me he was attracted to the maturity and reliability of older guys rather than any monetary gain, which may be why their relationship is lasting. I doubt that he thinks of his friend as a Dad although there is enough age difference .
     JT - Sun 21 Dec 2008 18:46:50

It seems that I'm on that fence: look for a Sugar Daddy or become one. I know it's selfish, but I think a Sugar Daddy would seem like a replacement for my own Father, and I don't need to go through age-related loss all over again.
     As most of my "work" is youth-related, I think a 30ish similarly inclined person would be ideal (no I don't mean screening "patient/client's"--way too young! And there's no way I'm endangering my "Working with People at Risk" Certification.)
     When it comes to money, I only want a basic rent payment not a lavish lifestyle.

Of course age matters.
You have two different people at two different stages in life.
Usually its the younger one that suffers as the older one has experienced life already and stops the younger one from having his own experiences. You cannot live on another's memories which always seem to be thrusted onto the young one... Sadly the older one gets their way through mental manipulation and guilt trips.
If any young guys are considering a "relationship" with an old fella make sure hes rich and generous to you otherwise you will regret missing out on the enjoyable things people of the same age do together.
The sex is also an issue, impotence strikes more often as the guy gets older and he quite often blames the younger one for not providing enough stimulation.
Boys don't do it.....enjoy yourself and have a good life which fulfills you in all areas.
- Tue 30 Dec 2008 17:24:34 Replies: 1, add
This is the opinion of the poster.

I think this is a little harsh. Yes, I would like sex to be part of a relationship, but as my already admitted bad health means, it's not the most important.

_______________________________Enough rave from me, now I'll scan down to the up-to-date stuff:

Re: "Pierce" has moved on.
hey prof
I'm in a committed relationship which sometimes has threesomes etc but I also confess I'm a bit of a beat addict.
I probably do not think the relationship will last forever sometimes I wish my partner would dump me.
Sexually we are reasonably compatible though no sparks fly or images of galloping horses come to mind.
Is it bad for me to wish my partner had a bigger penis?
chad - Sun 14 Mar 2010 04:34:54 Replies: 1, add
Re: Re: "Pierce" has moved on.
Nothing is perfect in this world. I for one has a near perfect partner, we are very compatible. Have been together over 5 years. I would call it a good relationship, no dramas, no arguements. However, I am more adventurous when comes to sex. That is when the sex buddies roles come in. I fulfilled my sexual needs with other people without having fallen in love. We both have a open minded when comes to things like this. It works for us.

No point to dump your partner because he has a small penis, just have casual/ on going sex buddies with larger penises!!!
- Sun 14 Mar 2010 12:34:32

I had hoped for a little more feedback than that, but I like the honesty in those answers. It seems to me that both are moderately committed relationships that allow for getting side dishes without having to cheat.

Personals sites
I have had a few queries about alternative Personals sites for people to use once Pinkboard Personals has closed. I am unable to recommend any as I haven't used any for ages, not even Pinkboard. Does anybody have suggestions? It is OK to post the address of the site.
Panther Confirmed - Mon 15 Mar 2010 20:37:47

I'm disappointed that the Personals are closing, but I guess it's a big job for one person to maintain. I used "" for a while.

I think it would be a great idea if someone who's compared several sites could rate them on their financial viability as customers.

Does anyone know of a tutor or place that I could get lessons in speaking. I have done a few course but am looking for direction in project my voice, better pronunciation etc ....
- Thu 1 Apr 2010 13:35:56

At the risk of another shot from the "Walter Mitty" fan, ask Panther for my email. I did Trinity College voice training, and used to record radio ads while still in High School. If my parents could have afforded it, I should have gone to a Performing Arts High School instead.
     A friend living in Tokyo six months of the year teaches English over the internet. His wife (Native Japanese) takes on the absolute beginners, they then "graduate" to him to increase their vocabulary, and I'm slated for the advanced--all we do is converse, and I correct errors and pronunciation. It's all done over Skype/phone. Learning English is really big in Japan, trial runs last year were good, and having Australian teachers was a great hook, because most Japanese students end up sounding like Americans.
The Professor Confirmed - To those who did read, thanks for your time! - Sat 10 Apr 2010 04:49:03 Replies: 1

Back in 2002, when I last spent three months in Japan for a second time, I found many people wished to practice their English with me and recognized my Australian accent. Most aimed to end up with a North American accent and spelling, which they think of as standard English, but they value an opportunity to become familiar with different English accents. I hope you enjoy working with them.
- Sat 17 Apr 2010 08:05:23

lightningEEP1 Confirmed - Tue 20 Apr 2010 17:50:29

Please use the new Graffiti Walls to continue this discussion.
Panther Confirmed - Mon 26 Apr 2010 09:26:40

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